Conference moira::parenting_v3

559.0. "Night Terrors in an 8 year old" by PSYCHE::ELLIOTT () Tue Dec 11 1990 16:30

    Hi,
    
    I know that Night Fears has been addressed in here before, but I have
    an 8 year old who has a lot of difficulty staying in his bed at night. 
    Three factors came into play around the same time:
    
    o we moved to a large house which afforded each child his own bedroom. 
    The 8 year old, Nicholas, (was 7 at the time) had shared a room with his
    brother (9 yrs old) since birth.  Nicholas is the youngest of 3 boys.
    
    o about 2 weeks after we moved in, the dog was out one night and ran
    into a horseshoe post way in the back of the property.  He came in the
    house bleeding with his chest split open.  The kids heard the commotion
    and came running out.  Nicholas was petrified that something out "in
    the woods" had gotten the dog.  We discovered the next day that he had
    run around a tree into the post, (we didn't know it that night) yet were
    careful to explain to the boys exactly what happened.
    
    o the house has a lot of property and is not close to other houses and
    is bordered by woods.  The boys have never lived in a secluded setting
    like this before. (I thought they'd love it but it seems to scare
    them!)
    
    We moved into the house in July.  The first week after the
    dog-hit-the-horseshoe-post incident, Nicholas slept in his brothers
    room.  I've tried to migrate him to his own room and he will stay in
    there for maybe half the night before pulling all his own blankets into
    his brothers room and sleeping on the floor.  This seems to be going on
    a *long* time and all my efforts have failed.  He *wants* to sleep in
    his own room.  I commented to him the other night that he made it til 4
    am (at which time I got up and noticed him still in his room but at 7
    he had moved) and maybe sometime he could make it all night.  He said
    "Tonight *I* will make it."  But he didn't.  He has a nightlight.  I've
    reassured him countless times and we've talked about it a lot but I
    can't seem to make a difference.  His teacher said he seems tired a lot
    of days and I told her this story.  (she asked if the dog was okay,
    yes, after 50 stitches and 2 weeks recuperation)  But the child is
    still not over it!  Any thoughts?  Thanks
    
    Susan      
      

    Susan, I do hope by now the trauma is under control, you and your
    family have witnessed an awful site and the after effects are
    legitimate and justifed.  From the standpoint of a pet owner your dog
    IS a member of your family and deserves all the TLC you give him.  But
    for you son, I'd suggest that if it isn't under control that you
    consult with a professional councelor, one who specializes in
    "trauma-psycology"  There is one at my favorite place, Umass Medical in
    Worcester.  
    
    The other thought that comes to mind is to borrow a baby minder type
    device and to simply reasure you son that you *can* hear him and all he
    ahs to do is call you if he needs reasurance.
    
    Good luck
    Lyn