Conference 7.286::sports_90

    I believe this will be a VERY quiet note until around draft time.
     :*)
    
    Lee

JETS GIVE STEINBERG FULL CONTROL AS NEW GENERAL MANAGER
-------------------------------------------------------

The New York Jets today announced the hiring of Dick Steinberg
as general manager.  Steinberg had been serving as director of
player development for the New England Patriots.

Jets owner Leon Hess said in a prepared statement that the
Jets had found, "the best football man to take full charge of
our team's operation.  Steinberg's authority and command of the
football operations will be with full power to bring about those
changes which are necessary to rebuild the team."

Hess offered Steinberg the job as Jets' general manager last 
Friday.  Steinberg reportedly was offered $3.2 million over 
five years to fill the position that has been vacant since Weeb 
Ewbank retired in 1973.  Jets President Steve Gutman and 
Personnel Director Mike Hickey have shared most of the duties 
normally performed by a general manager.  

Steinberg is considered an outstanding evaluator of talent.
His drafting helped build the Los Angeles Rams into a Super
Bowl team and the Patriots made the Super Bowl after he moved
on to New England in 1981.  

"I'm looking forward to working with the New York Jets and Leon
Hess and Steve Gutman," said Steinberg.  "It's our goal to make 
the New York Jets a winning team and to bring a championship to
the fans of the Jets.  I've certainly enjoyed my association
with the Patriots through both the good and bad times."

One of the major decisions facing Steinberg will be the fate
of coach Joe Walton.  Walton has produced only two winning
seasons in seven years as head coach.  The Jets are 4-11
entering the final week of the season.

       The word now is that the Pats are going to the league to make
    the Jest give them compensation. I think that's a classless move.
    I don't think a team should have to compensate if they're giving the
    guy a better job than the one he's leaving. Looks like this will
    clear the way for BD Joe to join the Browns!
                                      Denny

    As bizarre as it sounds there's another scenario being tossed around
    by some folks in Foxboro. According to a little birdie I know Joe
    Walton may be considered for the job of, are you ready, Ray Berry's
    Offensive Coordinator. Truly Offensive....

       Joe and Ray, what a team! Would anyone actually pay to see a
    Pats game if this happened? I sure wouldn't. Even JoJ knows Walton
    is a Zero.
                                         Denny

    
    re: -1
    
    Bingo... heard it last night on the news on 56.  Joe Walton
    is being considered for the offensive coordinator job of the
    Pats... I love it!
    

Here's a Xmas carol I found that was written just for Joe Walton...it
    sounds alot like Frosty the Snowman.
    
    
    
Joey the Brain Dead
Is a very dopey coach
with his hat turned round and a painful look
and his finger up his nose

Joey the Brain Dead
Calls some really boring plays
When it's third and long everybody knows
That the draw is on it's way

There must have been some flavor in
that booger that he picked
Cuz he chewed it for an hour then
He saved it on a stick

Ohhhh, Joey the Brain Dead
Doesn't really draft too well
All of his top picks in the last few years
are just workin down at Mel's

Ohhhh, Joey the Brain Dead
Wears a constipated look
As his game plan fails and his team gets crunched 
and his pants fill up with gook

He won some games in 86 
So Hess thought he should stick
So they renewed his contract and
we're now stuck with this dick

Ohhhhhhhh, Joey the Brain Dead
a genius he is not
for his play calling is so predictable
and his hands are full of snot

His haaannnnds 
are fulllll
of Snoooooootttttttttt..

    Ha ha ha, good one, JoJ.  :*)
    
    Lee

I'm Roollin' JoJ!!!

	I was laughing out loud, and the guy in the next cube stuck his head
over and gave me a dirty look. Prolly wants to lose some teeth.

.... and his pants were full of gook.       ha ha hah

Mike JN

    Joe Walton was offensive coordinator for the Redskins in the late
    70s and did a pretty good job. Maybe the offensive line situation,
    is not his fault. Could he do a worse job than Berry and co.
    
                               Steve J.

	Pats were the only AFC team without a pro-bowl representative.

	Atlanta, Dallas, and Tampa Bay were not represented on the NFC squad.

�	Pats were the only AFC team without a pro-bowl representative.
    
    They do too!  Rich Camarillo.  (So what if he was cut by the Pats two
    years ago for Feagles)

Don't forget, Tony Girly-Mon Easy-on will be donning his red miniskirt
and participating with the AFC Cheerleaders...

    I'm Rolloing....  :^)
    
    
    Big Game

    I AM AN ADVID PATRIOTS FAN. ONLY BECAUSE OF MY BROTHER, STANLEY MORGAN 
    I LIVE IN EASLEY, SOUTH CAROLINA AND WORK FOR DEC GREENVILLE. I DON'T 
    GET A LOT OF INFORMATION ON STAN OR THE PATS PRIMARILLY BECAUSE WE'RE SO
    FAR AWAY.I WOULD APPRECIATE IT IF YOU COULD UPDATE ME ON STAN AND THE
    PATRIOTS.THANKS   " STANLEY MORGANS' HALF BROTHER "
                                       MICHAEL D. HUNT SR.
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    
    

    Welcome, Michael.  So you're the Steamer's brother, huh?  Hell of
    an athlete.
    
    The only thing I've heard lately is that Fred Smerlas, a Pan B
    freeagent from the Bills, has been talking to the Pats, or will
    soon.  He's also interested in the 49'ers, the Raiders and the Colts.
    He's played 10 years in the NFL, after having a fine career at BC.
    
    Oh yeah, Flutie is a free agent.  Not much else in the news for
    present personnel.
    
    I'll try to add any new things that I hear.
    
    You know, I've often wondered what would have happened to Stanley
    if he'd played with a guy like Montana or Marino during much of
    his career.  While he's had a great career, I think he'd have gotten
    much better national media coverage than what he's received.  Grogan
    just loved to hit him, but Grogan isn't a Montana, and the Pats
    have never had a team like the 49'ers.  
    
    To my mind, he had the tools to be like Largent and Rice.  We'll
    never know, of course.  Guess that's much of the fun of being a
    sports fan.
    
    Lee

       Hey Michael, tell your brother the fans up here think he's a
    true class act. He's one of those guys (hannah was another) that
    you wish could have played for a better team during his career.
                                        Denny

       Michael, you might also want to take a look at the Pats conference,
    it's on TERRA::NEW_ENGLAND_PATRIOTS
                                        Denny

    Welcome, Mike.  It's neat to hear from relatives of professional
    athletes in here.  Another person who notes from time to time is Dana
    Barros' mom.  Also, Doug Flutie's dad works for DEC, but he's never
    noted in SPORTS, which is probably a good idea.......  :-)
    
    Oh, I think I should warn you.  Stay the heck away from 110.  There's a
    bunch of loonies in there!
    
    Hawk

    
    I'll second that.
    
    Someone asked me to help Judge. I couldn't make head nor tail of
    it. 
    
    						Wayne
    

re Hawk:

	Thus spake the bailiff ;^)

re other sports relatives...

	I'm not positive, but I heard somewhere that Scott Young's
	mom works for DEC.  He's a forward/defensemen for the Whalers!

gOwhAle!

    SPeaking of Morgan, I know that at one time in his carrer that he
    was averaging 20 yds/catch. Paul Warfield is the only man to finish
    with a career avg of > 20. (And that's saying something !)
    
    Tell me someone, is Stanley still up there ?
                          
    Doc

       I think he's slipped below it a little Dock. I'm sure John will
    come to our rescue.
                                         denny

    Can someone tell me how my brother, Joe Montana, is doing this year?
    Tell him to send money.
    
    Cowboy
    

    Going into this season, Stanley was averaging 19.5 yards per catch
    in the regular season and 16.9 yards per catch in the playoffs.
    This year, he had an average of 17.4 (28/486).  His regular season
    career is now 534/10352, for an average of 19.4.  After the 1986
    season, he was 435/8692, for an average of 19.98 yards so that was
    the last time he was averaging 20 yards per catch.  He averaged
    over 20 yards per catch for the first 6 years of his career.
    
    John

    .23
    
    She does.  She works in MRO3.
    
    Chuck
    
    

    Re:  Previous note, reference .22, not .23
    
    Chuck

Mike Johnston's dad, Mike, works at Digital also.
Mike plays Defensive End, Offensive Guard, and Special Teams for the
Castle Rock Dolphins, and pitches for the Castle Rock Cougars.

Mike JN

    Thanks guys for your responses, I'll see Stan in a couple of weeks and
    make sure he knows how supportive EVERYBODY is.
    Mike

    In case you hadn't heard, Raymond Berry has been fired as the head
    coach of the New England Patriots.

    The Patriots notesfile has moved.  It is now on
    CHCAGO::NEW_ENGLAND_PATRIOTS.  Add the entry or hit KP7.

    It has been reported in the PATRIOTS conference that Rod Rust has been
    named the new head coach for New England.  Rod was the defensive
    coordinator for NE before taking on the DC post at Pittsburgh.

    
    
     Great, I can hear all the Popeye and Olive Oyl jokes already.
    
    
    Steven
    
    

    Big mistake if you ask me!

    Good, I never liked having a guy named Rust on the Steelers.
    
    Rod Rust?  Sounds like a kindler, gentler, term for (.......)
    
    Kinda ironic the Pats notesfile is on node CHCAGO - the name of
    the team that handed them there worsted loss.
    
    Sarge

>    Rod Rust?  Sounds like a kindler, gentler, term for (.......)
    
    JD, you've been in the Great NorthWet(tm) too long! :-)

       Rust also stopped off in KC for a while between foxboro and
    Pittsburgh.
                                           Denny

As the guy on the radio said this morning:

	Oh no, the Patriots have Rust!

And, since he's the coach of the Patriots and he's got his *work*
cut out for him, I'll quote Neil Young too....

	Rust never sleeps....

    I see in today's paper that quite a few assistant coaches have been let
    go.  Two former players who were part of the Pats' coaching staff are
    now looking for work - Guy Morris and Harold Jackson.

    Released:
    
    Offensive Line Coach Guy Morriss
    Defensive Line Coach Eddie Khayat
    Linebacker Coach Don Shinnick
    Wide Receivers Coach Harold Jackson
                                   
    Resigned:
    
    Defensive Backfield Coach Jimmy Carr (went to Atlanta to join Jerry
    Glanville's staff)
    
    On the Bubble:
    
    Assistant Defensive Line Coach Ray Hamilton
    Running Backs Coach Bobby Grier (probably to be reassigned to the
    scouting staff)
    
    Retained:
    
    Strength and Conditioning Coach Jerry Simmons
    Quarterback Coach Richard Wood
    Assistant Linebacker Coach Don Blackmon
    Special Assistant John Polonchek
    Special Teams and Tight End Coach Keith Rowen
    
    Comments:
    
    Berry gave Blackmon and Hamilton a chance to break into coaching
    by assisting at their old positions.
    
    Special Assistant John Polonchek is in charge of supervising film
    breakdown and doing the computer analysis.
    
    One rumor floating around is that Steve Nelson is going to join
    the Patriots staff.  
    
    John

    Ahhh, Steve Nelson, my all-time favorite Pats defensive player.
    Maybe not with the best tools, but what a heart he has.
    
    Nice of Berry to help with Don And Sugar Bear.  While I did get
    tired of his coaching style, you can't say enough about the man.
    
    He took this firing as he took everything else that came his way,
    calm and under control.  
    
    Lee

    	One more year and the Patriots will be gone.  So I could care
    less who coaches the team in its lame duck season.
    
    				/Don

    
�    He took this firing as he took everything else that came his way,
�    calm and under control.  

Ain't it wonderful what Valium will do ;^)

       steve Nelson has been hired as ass't. LB coach.
                                        Denny

    Nellie will coach the inside backers and Don Blackmon will coach
    the outside backers.  Also, former San Diego head coach and current
    Kansas City offensive coordinator Al Saunders turned down an offer
    to join the Patriots as offensive coordinator and will remain in
    KC.
    
    John

    Geez, I didn't realize how many damn coaches there are on any one team
    in the NFL........
    
    Hawk

    Most teams are organized something like this:
    
    Offense:
    
    Offensive Coordinator (who may also be a position coach)
    Quarterbacks
    Running Backs
    Wide Receivers
    Offensive Line
    Special Teams/Tight Ends
    
    Defense:
    
    Defensive Coordinator (who may also be a position coach)
    Defensive Line
    Defensive Backs
    Linebackers (1 or 2)
    
    Miscellaneous:
    
    Strength and Conditioning
    Special Assistant, Research and Development, Quality Control.  Whatever
    the title, he's responsible for working with the team's computer
    staff, preparing game plans, film breakdown and so forth.
    
    John
    

    	Yeah Hawk, it won't be long before each player has a personal
    trainer/coach/psychologist/babysitter/motivator
    
    				/Don

�    Nice of Berry to help with Don And Sugar Bear.  While I did get
�    tired of his coaching style, you can't say enough about the man.
    
    From what I remember, Hamilton's coming on board was part of the deal
    struck to get him back during the strike.

    Adams and Harold Jackson came back during the strike.  Ray Hamilton
    was (and still is) below 200 pounds and looks like he's in great
    shape.  Many ex-football players could take a lesson from him.
    
    John

       The pros are getting so they almost have as many assistants as
    Oklahoma!
                                         Denny

>       The pros are getting so they almost have as many assistants as
>    Oklahoma!
    
    Somebody has to earn a way to pay for all those free scholarships and
    the bennies that come with them.

    But the players at Oklahoma make more money than the Pats players do!!!
    :-)
    
    JaKe
    

     I don't doubt that that may be true in some cases !!
    
    Big Game

    
    Yeah, but at N.C. St. they are more creative. If they don't get enough
    money from the school/boosters they fix games for the bookies.

>    One more year and the Patriots will be gone.  So I could care
>    less who coaches the team in its lame duck season.
 
    Can someone explain. Are the Patriots moving ? If so, where to ?
    
    	Wayne

�    Can someone explain. Are the Patriots moving ? If so, where to ?
    
    There has been speculation that the Patriots would move ever since the
    Sullivan family reported they were in financial trouble.  Cities like
    Fort Lauderdale and St. Louis have made alot of noise trying to attract
    NFL teams or NFL expansion teams.  Vic Kiam, the new owner, isn't
    particularly happy with Sullivan Stadium (to put it mildly) and wants
    to have a new facility built closer to Boston.  I guess the latest
    rumor is that a new facility may be built near Providence, RI.

(From Clarinews)

Subject: Patriots' Singleton dealing with twin brother's illness
 
	FOXBORO, Mass. (UPI) -- For 22 years, Chris and Kevin Singleton were
always together -- in action, in thought, in feeling.
	Kevin was a pitcher, Chris was his catcher. In high school, they
were the matched-set forwards on the basketball team; in football they
were the running backs and defensive ends.
	``Kevin would start a sentence and Chris would finish it,'' their
mother Margaret recalled Sunday in a telephone interview after Chris was
the No. 8 pick in the NFL draft, chosen by the New England Patriots.
	The brothers, identical twins, were Arizona's star linebackers,
until Kevin was diagnosed last summer as having lymphoblastic leukemia.
While Chris continued his football career, Kevin underwent treatment. In
January, a bone-marrow transplant was needed and Chris was the perfect
donor for Kevin.
	``It felt great,'' said Chris. ``What more can you ask than (the
opportunity) to help your brother live?''
	The family that always talked about when the boys would ``go to the
pros,'' now just talks about Chris' professional future. Kevin's
leukemia is now in remission and maybe he will have a future again.
Whether it includes football is uncertain.
	Their mother was with both sons in Tucson during Sunday's draft and
said it was a difficult day.
	``I'm very happy for Chris. But I knew in my heart that Kevin was
sad and thinking: `Why isn't it me?' He got quiet and went into the
kitchen. After 10 minutes, I went in and we talked, and I told him,
`There's no explanation why these things happen.'''
	``I'm excited for Chris, life goes on for me,'' said Kevin, ``I'm
not going to feel sorry for myself.''
	Until the diagnosis, Kevin said, ``I had no idea what leukemia was.
Why would I want to know anything about it? I don't want to know about
it now.''
	The brothers each grew to 6-foot-2 and only a few people were
always sure which Singleton they were talking to. ``But Chris is nearly
250 pounds and I'm down to 210,'' said Kevin. ``Now you can really tell
us apart.''
	On the day Chris had been waiting and working for, he was the third
linebacker taken in the college draft.
	``But the important thing is that Kevin keeps improving every
day.'' said Chris. ``He's almost back to normal. He's a little slower,
but he's doing great.''

(From Clarinews)

Subject: Patriots draft LB Singleton, DE Agnew
 
	FOXBORO, Mass. (UPI) -- The New England Patriots, among the NFL's
biggest losers last season, Sunday appeared to be one of the biggest
winners in the annual college draft.
	New England, which owned the No. 3 choice overall, traded it to the
Seattle Seahawks as part of a deal involving six draft choices. The
Patriots received the 8th and 10th picks overall and used them to select
a pair of highly regarded defensive players -- Arizona linebacker Chris
Singleton and N.C. State defensive end Ray Agnew.
	``This is a very happy day,'' said New England's director of player
development, Joe Mendes. ``They are both highly competitive players and
they are both quality people.''
	The Patriots finished last season with a 5-11 record, due largely
to the league's 23rd ranked defense, which gave up 391 points.
	Seattle used the No. 3 pick to select Miami defensive lineman
Cortez Kennedy. The Seahawks also gave New England a 1990 third-round
choice and a 1991 fourth-round selection while picking up New England's
1990 second-round selection.
	In the third round, the Patriots selected LSU quarterback Tommy
Hodson and Michigan wide receiver Greg McMurtry, who grew up in nearby
Brockton. Four years ago, McMurtry was the Boston Red Sox' first-round
pick as an outfielder, but turned down a reported $250,000 signing
bonus.
	``I wanted to get an education more than anything else,'' said the
6-2, 207-pound McMurtry, who was usually projected as a late first-round
selection in the NFL draft.
	``Every year, some players slide through,'' he said.
``Unfortunately, I was one of those players, but fortunately I was taken
by the home team.''
	Hodson's best seasons at LSU were his first two, but Mendes said
the quarterback's decline in effectiveness reflected the decline in the
Tigers' personnel.
	``He had a very suspect offensive line the last year and a half,''
said Mendes.
	Hodson describes himself as a ``pocket passer'' who can ``put the
ball where it's supposed to be thrown.''
	The Patriots have only two quarterbacks on their roster, veterans
Steve Grogan and Marc Wilson. Mendes said Hodson will be a backup during
the 1990 season ``and I told him it's an ideal situation for a
quarterback to come into. We're going to approach this as a red-shirt
year for Tommy Hodson.''
	The Patriots made three other deals on the opening session of the
two-day draft. New England traded away 3rd-, 6th- and 8th-round choices
to Dallas in return for the Cowboys' 3rd-, 5th- and 7th-round picks.
Then, New England traded its 4th-round selection to the Washington
Redskins in return for the first two picks of the 5th round. Finally,
New England traded the second pick of the 5th round to Denver for the
Broncos' 4th-round choice in 1991.
	In the fifth round, the Patriots took East Carolina defensive back
Junior Robinson, 5-9, 181 pounds; Minnesota offensive tackle Jon
Melander, 6-6, 280 pounds, and Texas Tech running back James Gray, 5-11,
200 pounds.
	By surrendering the No. 3 overall pick, the Patriots gave up their
chance of bringing Houston quarterback Andre Ware, the Heisman Trophy
winner, to New England.
	``We would have loved to have Andre Ware here -- at the right
pick,'' said Mendes, who was concerned with getting the best value with
each selection. ``And with an aging football team, we needed to go to
the well a few more times.''
	``We probably got two Mercedes-Benzes in exchange for a Rolls
Royce,'' said Patriots General Manager Patrick Sullivan.
	The Patriots also had coveted offensive lineman Richmond Webb, but
the Miami Dolphins, whose No. 9 pick was sandwiched between New
England's two first-round choices, selected the Texas A&M star. If Webb
wasn't available to the Dolphins, it is believed they would have taken
Baylor linebacker James Francis.
	The Patriots considered the gamble of taking Webb with the No. 8
pick and hoping Miami would not pick Singleton, ``but we didn't think it
was worth it to try and be cute,'' said Mendes. ``We thought about it
momentarily.''
	The 6-foot-2, 247-pound Singleton, who is regarded as an excellent
pass rusher, said in a telephone interview, ``I thought I was a top 10
player and I thought I would be selected in the first 10.'' He said the
most important qualities in a football player are: ``Hard work,
leadership, discipline and work ethic.''
	Agnew is 6-3, 280 pounds and can bench press 500 pounds. Mendes
described him as ``a complete player, a highly competitive player, who
is highly intelligent.''

    Heard on WEEI during lunch that the Patriots have traded their two
    seventh round picks in this year's draft to Buffalo, for the Bills'
    twelfth round pick this year and fourth round pick in 1991.
    
    
    py

    Patriots visit Phoenix this year on the Sunday before Thanksgiving.  My
    first Pats game!
    
    I had to move out here so I could see the Celtics for the first time
    too!
    
    Mike

    Mike, will they be serving crow on T-Day?  How "appropo".
    
    Mark.

>    Mike, will they be serving crow on T-Day?  How "appropo".
    
    Mark, if the Pats can't beat Phoenix, they should be flogged!
    
    Mike

    Anyone catch Mike Ditka on LA Law last night?  He was being sued by a
    season ticket holder for his team not making the playoffs, and while on
    the stand finally had enough from the fan and from the fan's lawyer, so
    he laid into him.  Gave him a busload of grief, and finished it up with
    "and if you don't like it you don't deserve the Chicago Bears.  You can
    just move to New England and become a Patriot fan!"  Had me rolling...
    
    In the next scene, Arnie is asking about Eddie Andelman.  Don't know
    why, but he seems to really snivvel about the show and probably knows
    someone who could get that done.  Maybe he arranged the Patriot cut
    too?
    
    Dan

Dan,

I saw that too.  Almost fell on the floor over that one.  My first 
thought was that maybe they aired different scenes in different parts
of the country.  Anyone outside of New England see the same scene?

Mike

yes...

but then  ditka is sentenced to 3 hours with the armchair QB that brought the 
suit partially because the Judge was a Pats fan...


Metz

       The Exec. Producer of LA Law is from Boston. Eddie had him on the
    show a few weeks ago. He was talking about the Bears reference in last
    nights episode. Eddie asked him if he could put in a plug for the Pats
    or Sox. He did even better, he put in a plug for Eddie.
                                              Denny

    I think one of the actors is also from Cambridge.

    
    Any predictions on how many players will go down with season-ending
    injuries tonight?
    
    Pre-season games are a waste.
    
    Dickster
    

    Other than the fact that Montreal is one of my favorite cities and
    I enjoyed the trip, it was a waste.  No season ending injuries,
    though.
    
    John

    I've always liked Grogan, but it's apparent the Patriots are going
    nowhere this year.  Why not ask the man to retire and help out the
    coaching staff?  I'd rather watch the kids play (and probably lose)
    than Grogan and, when the kids are ready, Wilson.  Proctor didn't even
    get in to play Thursday night.  It'd be a shame to lose a potential
    player like him, to hold onto a 37 year old quarterback with one year 
    left on an awful team.
    
    					Steve 

>    player like him, to hold onto a 37 year old quarterback with one year 
>    left on an awful team.
 
Ha... When I first read this I thought it said, "one year left on an awful 
arm."  I thought Grogs shoulda retired last year.  
   

    	Couldn't agree with you more Steve.  If the Patriots cut Proctor
    somebody will pick him up, then about halfway through the season
    with Grogan and Wilson down (a distinct possibility) the Pats will
    be searching the waiver wire for a quarterback.  As of today the
    Pats plan on using a wimp and a gimp for their quarterback tandem.
    Well at least it's better than last year when they had two wimps,
    a gimp and a shrimp.  At least they've cut their liablilities in
    half.
    
    				/Don

    Then, they should get the'Fridge from the Bears, put him at QB,
    and then have a blimp.
    
    Lee

    	C'mon you guys. Stop it. I nearly wet my pants reading
    	the last two.
    
    	Don, Lee,
    
    	Youse guys outta be a team.
    
    	Scott

    /don,
    
    
    still trying  to figure out  why ya got  season tickets..
    
    i bet the Redskins are  foaming at the mouth, they cant wait to
    come in here, and air it out.. even in early december.. i figure
    
    a warm front will come through  NEW  ENGLAND through december till
     giants  play  dec 30th :)
    

    	Cuz I'm a real fan Dinz.  Not a johnny-come-lately-frontrunning-
    yuppie-perrier-drinking-vane like someone we both know.
    
    				/Don

    /Don got the tickets so he can cook burgers in the moonscape parking
    lots in 10 degree December weather. Not to mention the fine LA beers in
    the stadium!!
                                  Denny

    denny, oh so /don can cook the 15th  when i go as well as the 30th?
    
    
    

       I already talked to /Don, he's cooking and we cain sit in the heated
    car and watch!
                                      Denny

    	Dinz, the only thing I'll cook for you on the 30th is crow, because
    you and your Midgets will be stuffing your faces with it!
    
    				/Don
    
    	P.S.  How do you like your steaks Denny?

    Thick!!!
    
                                   Denny

    	The Patriots made more turnovers than Dunkin Donuts on a busy
    Sunday morning!  8^(
    
    				/Don

    
    The Pats will be lucky to finish last this season!! 8^)
    
    
    
    
    Steve

    The paper says that the New England tight ends are dropping like flies. 
    Do you think the Pats would be interested in trading for the rights to
    Steelers 1st round pick Eric Green.  The Steelers haven't been able to
    sign him and IMHO don't really need him.
    
    Just speculation.
    
    	--dan'l

    	Just as long as they beat the Jests Digger.  8^)
    
    				/Don

    
    
    I don't think they need any tight ends....they have 4 or 5 now.
    
    Cosby from the Cowboys tried getting a tryout recently, and was told
    the Pats were log jammmed at that position.
    
    
    Lou

    Just heard this one on WEEI radio:
    
    "Marc Sullivan is going to be the starting QB for the Patriots tonight
    in their exhibition game against Cincinnati....oops, that should be
    Marc Wilson."
    
    
    py

       They no longer serve LA Beer at Foxboro!!!
                                        Denny

    
    What is it now? Rheingold Light? A fabulous tasting swill.
    
    
    
    Steve

       I saw Bud Light and Coors Light at the stands near my seats. I'll
    investigate closer Friday. Although at $3.50 I won't be buying many!
    /Don'll be there Friday, so I suspect he'll be buying!! Right slasher?
                                         Denny

    	All my money is invested right now Denny.  I was hoping to borrow
    a couple of sawbucks from you for some beer!
    
    				/Don

       Anyone interested in buying cheaper beer, meet us at Doc & Nellies
    Bar in Canton a couple hours before gametime. You still gonna be there
    /Don?
                                         Denny

    I CANT BELEIVE THE PATRIOT'S THEY GET RID OF TINI EASYON WHO IS #1 6
    MIL 1.8 MIL MAN AND ONE MAN IS NOT TO BLAM AND NOW THEY GET RID OF
    GREAG DAVIS HE IS GOOD KICKER BUT ALL KICKER MISS A FEW AND HE COULD
    NOCK CHAINSAW ON HIS ASS AND NOW HE TOO IS TO BLAM LIKE TONI YET ALL
    THE INJURIES TO VERIS LIPTETT TIPLET HANNAH AND HIS SISTERS AND VICTOR
    KIAM NAZZ HE SELLS RAZORS AND NOT HOOEY AND HE BUY THE COMPANY AND I
    BET YOUD' LIKE TO BUT YOU CANT AND IF HAWK'S BEER BELLY WAS ON
    CHAINSAWS HEAD AND ROSANNE WAS SITTING ON HAWKS FACE COULD STEVEN
    GAULKE AND DOUGIE BEAT THEM AT A CHICKEN FIGHT AND KNOW EASYON DON'T
    WHERE NO DRESS CUZ HES A MAN HE PLAYS FOOTBALL IN THE PROS AND COLLEGE
    AND HE TOO COULD KNOCK CHAINSAW ON HIS BUTT AND WHY DOES WARDLE SEND ME
    JETS NEWSLETER WHEN I'M NOT A JET'S FAN BUT HE STILL SEND'S IT WHY
    DOESN'T PAUL YANKOWSKAS GET A REAL P-NAME AND WHO IS NORM I THINK YOU
    ARE ALL JEALOUS OF TONI EASTON AND HOOT MEL GIBSON HE'S NOT A ANKLE
    BITER AND MARK WILSON WAS A #1 PICK TOO AND HE COULD KNOCK CHANISAW ON
    THIS KEESTER AND NO ONE IS TO BLAM NOT REY BERRY TONI EASIN VICTOR KIAM
    DARRYL HANNAH OR STEVE GROGAN THE PAT'S CAN STILL BE IN PLAYOFF'S IF
    THEY WIN GAMES AFTER ALL MIAMI NOT AS GOOD AS IT LOOK'S AND BUFFALO
    COULD STILL LOSE AND I NEVER SAW AN EGG BEATER IN CHICAGO?
    
    
    
dj

JD --

That note was like that first glorious sip of beer after you've
been sweating and working your ass off all day....

Too funny.  

As funny as his typing is, even Dinz can't compare with the one
and only RCASO......

YU ARE NO TOO BLAM!!!!!111

'saw

    I'll buy the person who can regurgitate .100 in one breath a case of
    Sammys........
    

    Re. .100 - I'll bet that's just what it felt like sitting in the
    parking lot at Schaeffer, er, no SUllivan - oops, Foxboro Stadium
    Sunday. 
    
    Tremendous note, JD.
    
    NAZZ

    	Hey NAZZ, Sunday was a great day.  Girls in halters, plenty
    of cold beer, the only downer was the game.  8^)
    
    				/Don

       The grill was almost a downer /Don!!
                                                 Denny

    	It'll be fixed by the Jets game Denny.  I'm no lawyer but after
    reading that letter the Foxboro Stadium folks gave us I got an idea.
    The letter lays out all the new rules specifying about a dozen times
    that anything that "negatively impacts" your good time will not
    be tolerated.  Well I thought the outcome of the game "negatively
    impacted" my good time so the Foxboro folks should shell out some
    kind of reimbursement.  Whaddaya think fellow SPORTSters?
    
    				/Don

    	Steven the good time was had in the parking lot.  Now the stadium
    is another story.  $3.50 for 12 oz. of beer, $2.00 for a hotdog
    and about 100 drunks trying to pelt security guards with anything
    they cain get their hands on and missing the mark, showering the
    folks in the front row (i.e. me).  Good thing I like football so
    much.  8^)
    
    				/Don

    stevie boy,
    
    send me mail
    
    
    dinz
    

    /don,
    
    how many hot dogs did ya eat?
    
    dinz
    

       Doesn't Vic offer a 'money-back guarantee' on all his products? I
    wonder...
                                            Denny

    First round draft pick Chris Singleton was activated yesterday and will
    play in Sunday's game against the Bengals.
    
    
    py            

    What ever happened to Clayton Weishuhn?

    Signed with the Packers after his injury problems in the mid-eighties,
    never made it there either after his injuries, is probably back running
    the family farm in Texas.
    
    John

SEE WHAD HAPPEN TO PATSRIOT WHEN GIVE UP ON TINY EASYOFF!!!! PAT KNOW 
HAVE QUADERBACK TO RUN TEAM!!!!!  BROGAN IS TWO OLDE AND MARIC WILLYS IS 
KNOW TREATEED RIGHT BY FANS11!!  WILSON #1 PICK 5 MILLION DOLLLARS FROMN 
BYO AND HE LEED RIDERS OF LOST ANGELELOS TO PLAYYOFFS AND NOT MANY IN HERE
GOOD DOE DAT BUT STILLL WISLON GET BOOEEOD AND VIKOR KING OF SIAM HE A
DUM OWNER HE MUR WOORIED BOUT FEMALE RODEOS IN SHOWER THAM WITHHTHE
TEAM AND CIAM HE BUY LADI REMINTON RIFLE BNUT NUT SAMM AS RUNNING 
THE STAPSTIOURS AND HE GIVE UP ON TONNY EASTON CUZ FGANS BOOOZE HIM BUT
EASTER NOW ON JESTS AND PLAYING GOOOOD BACK BI HELPING OBEYCANOBIE RUN DA SHOW 
AND HOO IS TOO BLAM BUT THE FANST AND VICAR KIKIM AND WHAD MOWERATT DO TO
LADDY HERALDO PERSON THAT BLAM THE SPATS AND HOO CALLD WHO A CAUSTIC WITCH???

    Um... any word on whether Grogan will start this Sunday?

At least our ersatz RCASO didn't mention anyone knocking Chainsaw
on his butt.....

And, does it really matter who starts for the Patriots?  8^)

       Wilson will start Sunday according to the Glob.
                                           Denny

    HAHAHAHA!!!  Lady Heraldo person!  Too much!
    
    And, he didn't mention my beer belly on your haid, Chainsaw!  :-)
    
    And to think that I just wasted an hour in SOAPBOX trying to be
    entertained, and 30 seconds in here did more to lift my mood....
    
    Hawk

	OOH YAA DJ DELVIN, WELL WELL SEA THIS WEAKEND ABOUT HOWS GOOD EESONN
AND THE JETSS IS!!!! AFTER TIPPEETT AND SINGALTON KNOCKL KKKENNY OBRAIN
UNCONCIOUS AND OUT ODF  THE GAME, THEN THEY''LL GET THERE SHOTS AT EASONN!!
WILL TONEY WHERE A SKIRT ON THE FIELD OR WHAT???? HUH??? THIS WEAK WILL PROVE
THAT ONE MAN IS TO BLAM!!!!

Boy, I gotta tell ya, I miss old RCASO.  I mean, no one, but no one,
ever made me laugh so hard in this file.

Between his typing, and his SPORTS theories and his "Watch it pal"s
he kept me more entertained than most prime time TV.

Too bad he left the company.....

'Saw

PS  I'm keeping my RCASO Skool uv Typgin Decoder Ring as a collectors
    item.....

    
    These last few are just cheap imitations, IMO.  True RCASO dialogue
    just cannot be duplicated, at least not from one still possessing his 
    faculties.
    
    Hey, the guy was smart enough to skip off with the package while the
    gettin' was good, right?
    
    glenn

    In memory of Ralph and his inimitable noting style, I'd like to propose
    a moratorium on all casoing.  Okay, maybe I've got an alterior motive.

As Chris Berman would say:

		Nah!


8^)

    It depends what your alterior motive is........

    
    Pat's suck.

    RE: Pat's suck.
    
    I assume, however, they have scored an offensive TD.
    
    The Steelers are suckier.  Thanks, Joe Walton, for fixing what was not
    broken.
    
    	--dan'l

    No word in here yet about Fryar and Dykes?  Dykes is in satisfactory
    condition in a Providence hospital after a brawl in a local hot
    spot.  Fryar is "in custody" for an alleged concealed weapon.
    Checking to see if he has a permit for the gun...
    
    -Walt

    	The Redskins have a cutesy name for their receivers, maybe we
    can come up with one for the Pats?  The Outlaws?
    
    				/Don

    
    At least the Newspaper business is thriving!
    
    
    
    
    Steve

Which is folding quicker?  DEC or the Red Sox?  Next on Geraldo....

    What do the RedSox have to do with the Pats, 'saw?
    Who was the WR that got in trouble?  Cedric Jones?  I thought
    it was someone who got released, but I can't remember who.  
    Indecent exposure or something...
    
    Maybe they should change the plays and make it a handgun offense.
    
    Not the first time Irving's had problems with guns and permits.
    
    How did Dykes get himself in the position to get his butt kicked like
    that to begin with?  Something tells me there's a story being covered
    up...

    	Poor Cedric Jones, guilt by association.

    Walt, I think you are thinking of Stephan Starring.

    Darryl, I thought the "Twin Geeks" are Fryar & Clemens, not Fryar &
    Dykes, no?  Nonetheless, "Twin Geeks" is humorous......  :-)
    
    Hawk

    Yup, it was Starring, sorry about that.... apologies to Cedric...
    

Jeez, Walt, a guy can't make a simple mistake without you jumpin'
all over him ;^)

I was probably doing two or three things at once, thought I was in
the right topic and let fly....  Hell, I didn't even notice until
you mentioned it....

Whoa, reality....too cool.....

'Saw

PS  to answer your question, the Sox and Patsies both suck.....

    Hey Darryl Doda,
    
    I resent that remark.
    
    John

    Hey 'Saw, no need to sweat over it...

Sorry John.

Didn't mean to say all the employees, just the front office and 
the players....

daryll

    A few weeks ago a Boston sports figure gets hassled by a police
    department and this conference is filled with cries of self righteous
    rage.  A couple of other Boston sports figures get beat up in a bar and
    the conference erupts again as people stand in line for the lynching. 
    Doesn't any care about getting the facts anymore?
    
    From what I've read in the Patriots conference, Dykes and Fryar's
    injuries suggest that they were attacked from behind.  Dykes was on the
    ground being pummelled.  Fryar ran out to his car to grab a gun to
    break the fight up.  The only thing against the law that Irving has
    apparently done was to carry a gun (which was registered in Mass.) into
    RI.

    Ok, I made a crack or two, but I also said there must be more to
    it than what I've heard.  Maybe the press needs to give more 
    info when it happens.  
    
    I still want to know why they don't have Black guys, or guys
    of all colors and creeds on the sides of the helmets, but
    that might be a miscellaneous question...  Would Homey wear
    the helmet of Mr. Establishment?  Homey don't think so...
    
    ha ha...

>>    	The Redskins have a cutesy name for their receivers, maybe we
>>    can come up with one for the Pats?  The Outlaws?
    
>>    				/Don
  
    Hows about "condom hands", ain't catching a f#$king thing.
                                                    
    101115
    
    

    Anybody see the opening skit on SNL last week that was about Victor
    Kiam and his new line of "feminine" razors????????
    
    
    
    JaKe
    

    The bouncer from the Shalimar Club has been charged with felony assault.
                                      Denny

    
   Denny, he must of had some money on the Pats lasted week! 8^)
    
    Mac's right. It seems like alot of people like to play judge 
    and jury lately. If you weren't there you *really* never know
    what exactly happened now do you? Sure Fryar's previous actions
    warant some speculation but how about we give the guy the 
    benifit of the doubt for a change? Personally I thought that 
    those two going out that night was stupid, ecspecially after 
    all the crap that has been going on, but they have every right as 
    citizens of this fair land to do so, and they also have every 
    right to protect themselves.
    
    
    
    Steve  

    Steve, you're correct about their having rights.  
    
    But, how about brains?
    
    Lee

    
    Now LeE that is called stereo-typing and it's not very nice.
    Both of those gentleman are college gradiates for cryin out
    loud! 8^) Seriously though, maybe the bouncer had reason and
    then again maybe he didn't, he has no right to hit them and
    that's the bottom line. As far as I know the only people who 
    are allowed to smash you on the haid are police officers.
    
    
    
    Steve
    

    I'm roolin Walt ... now let's sing the Homey song ....

 Two things Mac, one the guys a bouncers, in general very few bouncers
 start trouble they're there to stop it. He may have hit them from behind
 but they must have been causing a scene a first.

 I read a report that said the trouble started at the door Fryar ran to
 his car and cameback with his gun waving and in the meantime was when
 Dykes got pop.

 So we have two conflicting story only time will tell who's telling the
 truth and who's not but you got to admit that Fryar is a team player
 he took the spotlight away from Zeke and Vic for awhile. Wonder if
 Vic will give him a bonus....

 mike

    
    Fryar was placed under arrest.  That's a fact.  I'll go out on a limb
    and say that that's not a good thing for him or the Patriots,
    especially since it's his second gun-related charge in the past two
    years (he pleaded guilty to the other in New Jersey).
    
    I won't speak for Dykes, but Fryar's got to be nearing the end of the
    road.  Innocent until proven guilty on the gun charge, but most
    definitely guilty of once again exercising poor personal judgement, 
    directly related to his responsibilities to the Patriots (frequenting
    a bar with a reputation for trouble at past 1 AM with meetings/practice
    scheduled at 9 AM the next morning).    
    
    glenn
    

    
    Taken from the today's Globe
    
     The accused assailant of Patriots wide reciever Hart LeE Dykes
    was convicted in an ax-handle beating of an electrical inspector 
    in 1974.
    
     Providence police yesterday issued a warrant yesterday for William
    Earley, 35, of Tiverton, R.I., for his part in a brawl involving
    Dykes and team-mate Irving Fryar outside a night club early Wednesday
    morning. 
    
     "Assault charges have been filed and we are investigating," Det. Capt.
    Bernard gannon said. "We are seeking un-biased witnesses to talk to
    and believe they can be found."
     
     Earley, also known as "Geech," is described in a police report as 6
    feet 6 inches, 270 pounds.
      
      (text omitted, relating to Earley's prior conviction.)
    
     Earley denied striking either Dykes or Fryar" with his hand or his 
    crutches," according to the police report. Earley also denied hitting
    Patriot in interviews with reporters Wednesday.
     
     Earley's left leg was in a plaster because of a torn Achilles' tendon
    injury he suffered in a touch football game, he said.
      
     Police were uncertain wether Earley was employed by the club. Earley
    was described as "a bouncer" by Fryar and an "enforcer" by others.
    
     According to an (unnamed) witness, Dykes and earley were arguing about 
    the Patriots won-lost recordnear the doorway to the bar.
    
     Fryar said he did not see how Dykes was knocked down, but Dykes injury 
    was caused by "a blow from a blunt instrument to the eye," according to 
    Dr. Robert Behr, an opthalmologist at Rhod Island Hospital.
    
    (text omitted, describing injury and Fryar's gun conviction.)
    
     Fryar said he pulled the gun after he saw Dykes being kicked while
    lying on the street. Dykes had been knocked down during an argument
    near the doorof the nightclub after the 1 a.m. closing hour. The 
    pistol was loaded, according to the police.
    
     Fryar "retrieved a 'chrome-plated' hand gun," from his Jeep, according
   to a police report.
     
     "Numerous witnesses stated that he came back toward the club
    brandishing the gun at them , menacing anybody and everybody by
    pointing the gun at them," the report said.
    
    
    	It goes on to say that the club has had trouble before and 
    that they have had liqour liscense prboblems.
    
    
    Steve
    

   Well! That settles it in my mind.
   	It was Lisa Olson's fault!

   Mike JN

       Sorry Mike. Everyone 'round here knows it's all Dukakis' fault!
                                       Denny

    >A few weeks ago a Boston sports figure gets hassled by a police
    >department and this conference is filled with cries of self righteous
    >rage.  A couple of other Boston sports figures get beat up in a bar and
    >the conference erupts again as people stand in line for the lynching. 
    
    In the middle of the day, a young man and his fiance get accosted by
    police outside a bank. 
    
    In the middle of the night, two men get accosted by a bouncer outside a
    bar.  One of them pulls a handgun, illegally, the one who has been
    involved in too many previous ugly incidences, running the gammut from
    drugs to guns to knives to false reports of crimes.
    
    Considering the differences between the circumstances I can understand
    why people might react to the first one differently than the second.
    
    Dan

Dan....

You should turn that last reply into a song by Bob Dylan.  It would
fit quite nicely 8^)

'Saw

    Maybe a Dead song, 'Saw.  Afterall, Dan does look a lot like Jerry
    Garcia with that beard of his........
    
    Hawk

    They bust 1 for flogging his dong at some reporter. Then two of them
    get in a fight outside a club. One pulls a gun and gets charged with
    the possibility that somebody that deserves to get shot might get
    shot. Sounds like these guys are applying for positions on the 
    Broncos.  Go Patriots!
    
    BoB

>You should turn that last reply into a song by Bob Dylan.  It would
>fit quite nicely 8^)
    
    It's a little known fact, Frank, but I actually helped out quite a bit
    with Dylan's lyrics.
    
    Dan

>    It's a little known fact, Frank, but I actually helped out quite a bit
>    with Dylan's lyrics.
    
Gee, Dan.  I'm impressed.  I guess I can tell my secret now.....
I was Paul....

fw

    
    Hey 'Saw, did you really die or what? Who buried you? And did they
    really say "I buried Paul," or "I shop at the mall,"? 
    
    
    
    
    Steve

>    Hey 'Saw, did you really die or what? Who buried you? And did they
>    really say "I buried Paul," or "I shop at the mall,"? 
    
Nah, it was one of those fake jobs, like on Miami Vice on time...


They really said, "Lucille Ball", in a tribute to Ringo's favorite
comedienne....

HTH,
'Saw    

    
       I always thought that they had a guest artist doing backing
    vocals on that cut and what was really said was "I'm Monty Hall"
    
    

    Is Hart Lee Dykes supposed to start in tomorrow's game against Miami?
                                           

    In yesterday's Globe, Hart Lee said he felt he'd be able to play.
    Elsewhere I read that Greg McMurtry may get the nod instead.
    
    Hope that clears everything up for you.  ;-)
    
    I have one question remaining from the Dykes incident.  How did a 250+
    lb guy on crutches ever catch up to an NFL WR?  

    I hear he's looking forward to the game.......
    
    HTH.
    
    Hawk

       Rust says Marc (winless) Wilson will get the start. Grogan says he
    cain play, but he's not 100%.
                                     Denny

    Oh, man... dreadful game last night.  Well, what I saw of it.  Mercifully, 
    the electricity at Chez Donnelly went out last night mid-way through the 
    2nd quarter.  We're talking bad.  
    
    Any NFL team that is the beneficiary of 4 turnovers in the same quarter 
    ought to be able to put up more than 3 points.  Granted this year's 
    edition of the Patriots is no SuperBowl contendah but they are seriously 
    underachieving.  The 'phins have got to be the worst 5-1 team I've ever
    seen.  I truly hope I see Marc Wilson's name on the waiver wire this
    week.
    
    A lot of NFL teams talk about "a committment to winning".  Some have
    it.  Some don't.  This year, I don't even think the Pats are paying it
    lip service.  Placing Marc Wilson's name on the waiver wire would be a 
    pretty good step towards it, though.  The Pats are 1-5, 4 games off the 
    league lead, and seem to be going nowhere.  I have to wonder... with Marc 
    Wilson on the field last night and a seemingly healthy John Stephens off 
    of it, are the Pats playing for the #1 pick next year?
    
    A couple of years ago, Hunter Thompson, writing about the Pats' SuperBowl 
    loss and the finger-pointing and drug "scandal" that followed it,
    predicted that "this team will be a death ship for the next 10 years".
    Do we really have 5 more years of this garbage?
    
    Can "someone" post the Pats' practice-squad roster?  Thanks much.

Wilson was bad but I don't know how many times I watched him hit Fryar or the 
square in the hands and these guys couldn't catch the ball. 
The NE Center and OG couldn't make a hole in a paper bag last night and John 
Stevens watched Hershel Walker on how to hit a hole then fall forward for 2yds. 


Jeff

I'm not a Pats fan, but they did look dreadful last night!

We saw the entire game in the bar after rugby practice, and I swear
some of our A side players could have done as well as some of the
Pats were doing last night.

Personally, from watching them, I think the problem is that there
is not a winning attitude on the club.  Granted, all of the
extra-curricular problems haven't helped, but these guys seem to
be just going through the motions!

that's too bad for the Pats,
'Saw

17-10

    Dolphins won.

    	And, Why, in God's name, did they call for Wilson to run
    	a quarterback sneak on the 4th and inches? I mean, give
    	the ball to someone who is a little heavier and used to
    	running the ball.
    
    	Maybe Kiam is hoping attendance will be so bad that he
    	can use that as an excuse to move the team outta the
    	area.
    
    	Both teams looked sorry. And, as someone previously mentioned,
    	Miami is the worst 5-1 team I've seen in a long time. Jensen
    	even looked bad.
    
    	Scott

    
         Why is it a team like the Dolphins has a bad night and all
     of a sudden it's the worse 5-1 team in history? The week they 
     killed Buffalo all I heard is how good thy are playing. As far
     as record at least they are still very much in the thick of it.
     There are other teams (Supposedly a lot better than Miami) that
     are all but out of it already.

    Pats beat the spread.  Too bad, I picked Miami in the pool ;-(
    
    Mike

    
    	The Pats D always give Marino and Miami fits...  They (Miami) are
    not as bad as they looked (on offense) last night...  Maybe the extra
    time off got them out of sinc...  One encouraging fact is that even
    that the D held even after those 5 turnovers (although I must admit, it
    was a combination of good defense and patetic offense)...
    
    	Other 5-1 teams are: SF, NYG, Bears, Raiders.  I wouldn't place the
    'Phins in the same league as SF and NYG (not yet), but I think they are
    comparable to the Bears and Raiders.  Of course, thats IMHO...
    
    LT

    IRving Fryar has to be among the biggest wimps in the NFL.  This guy
    goes so far out of his way to avoid contact that I don't understand why
    Jones, McMurtry and Dykes aren't the WRs.  If it were up to me, Fryar
    would be cut from the team immediately.
    
    Dan

    The 49ers and Giants are not 5-1, they are 5-0.
    
    JD

    Hey Dan, give Fryar a break.  He's had a rough life.......
    
    Hawk

    UNBELIEVABLE!!!  Dan and I agree on two things in the same week!!
    :*)
    
    Yeah, Fryar hasn't done a damn thing since he's been here.  Oh,
    he's had a game or two, but he's dropped more passes than my granny
    ever did.
    
    The Pats aren't gonna do anything until the last Sullivan is gone.
    Even then, it will be a long way back for the team.
    
    Lee

    
    re. .180
    
    	Oppss, you're right... So, between the Raiders, Bears, Buffalo
    (4-1, but likely to be 5-1), and the 'Phins, I don't think there is
    such a big difference in talent.  Again, the 49rs and Giants are ahead
    of these teams.
    
    LT

    >          -< I don't remember Fryar being involved in drugs >-
    
    He was one of the players turned in by Berry.
    
    Dan

    
    >>          -< I don't remember Fryar being involved in drugs >-
    
    > He was one of the players turned in by Berry.
    
    Also admitted to using while playing at Nebraska.
    
    glenn
    

Here is a mid-season statistical report on the Patriots.  The middle column
shows the NFL averages in the categories from last year.  Patriots offense is 
in the left column, Patriots defense is in the right.  Totals are doubled for
the Patriots to produce a projected total.


Category	NE Off		NFL Ave		NE Def

First Downs	254		300		326
Rushing		 52		108		146
Passing		178		170		160
Penalty		 24		 22		 20

Rushing
Plays		362		467		530
Yards		1210		1845		2401
Ave/Play	3.3		4.0		4.5
Ave/Game	75.6		115.3		150.0

Comment:  Probably the weakest area of the team, both offensively and 
defensively

Passing

Attempts	556		512		436
Completions	252		286		270
Comp %		52.5		55.8		61.9
Gross Yards	3506		3659		3838
Sacks		52		40		40
Yards lost	404		285		304
Net Yards	3102		3374		3534
Ave/Game	194		211		221
Ave/Play	6.31		6.12		8.37
Ave/Comp	12.0		12.8		14.2
Ints/Yards	24/362		20/244		24/284

Comment:  As was the case last year, the passing game is productive but very
inefficient.  It takes many more plays offensively to produce the same result
as the foes, and the team isn't getting as many long plays.  Opponents are 
producing more yards but also producing the yards more quickly.  Sacks on of-
fense are a big concern.  Interceptions on defense are a plus.

Total Offense

Total Yards	4312		5219		5936
% Rush		28.1		35.3		40.1
% Pass		71.9		64.7		59.9
Yards/Game	270		326		371
Plays		970		1018		1006
Yards/Play	4.5		5.1		5.9

Comment:  Offense and defense are both bad but offense is still worse than
defense.

Kicking

Punts		80		74		46
Gross Ave	41.8		40.2		42.5
Punt Returns	36		37		68
Ave/Return	7.0		9.0		10.0
Kickoff Returns	86		62		50
Ave/Return	19.0		19.4		19

Comment:  While league-wide average net average wasn't available, the punting
game is still a problem, even though Hansen has been an improvement over Jeff
Feagles.  Our net average is about 3-5 yards worse than the opponents.  I don't
know if it's because our return game is bad or our coverage is bad.

Fumbles/Lost	36/14		30/15		30/20
Penalties/Yards	98/778		103/826		78/532
Points		240		330		488
TDS		24		38		58
Rushing		4		13		28
Passing		18		21		28
Returns		2		3		2
Extra Pts	24		37		56
FG Made/Att	24/32		22/30		32/36

The defense is giving up points far in proportion to yards allowed which tells
me we're getting hit with a lot of long plays and we're getting stuck with a
lot of bad field position.  The offense is scoring far less than the yards
gained would indicate, and that's no surprise.

I wanted to find some glimmers of hope for improvement by doing this but there
really aren't any.  This unfortunately is a bad football team all around with
some few bright spots.

John
    

    	After digesting all this information John, I have only one
    question...
    
    	Think the Patriots will ever bring back the cheerleaders?
    
    				/8^)

    That may be the only way they can manage to even partially fill the
    stadium.
    
    Do they lose the half-time show, too?
    
    A&W

    	Actually the halftime show at the Colts game wasn't half bad.
    They had a high school band from Rhode Island, but they were better
    than a lot of college bands.  Of course I missed the best halftime
    show this year, pre-season against the Bengals, 100 aerobic
    instructors!  8^)
    
    				/Don

    rumor around here is that the Cardinals are giving away tickets for
    Sunday's game ;-)

    Pats make the USA QUOTE OF THE DAY:
    
    "Our record may lead everyone to think that we are just a ridiculously
    sorry team, but we're not."
    
    LB Vincent Brown

    
    The Patsies made even the lowly Phoenix Crudnals look like contendahs.
    
    Get enough rain up there in Seattle yet, JD?
    
    Dickster
    

    On HBO's Inside the NFL show this week that "expert" guy they have on
    there said that San Francisco will offer to trade Steve Young after
    this season...and the Patriots would be the first in line.
    
    Any talk up in New England about this?  What do you think the 29 year
    old, best backup QB ever is worth?
    
    	--dan'l

    >  Any talk up in New England about this?  What do you think the 29 year
    >  old, best backup QB ever is worth?
    
    More than the Pats could probably offer...
    
    
    py

    
    It looks to me like San Fran want's the #1 pick for Young, and
    the Pat's are assured of having the #1 pick, believe me, it's in
    the bag! If I were a member of the Pat's front office, I'd find
    out who San Fran is going to take with the #1 pick and pick him!
    But knowing the Pat's they'll take Young, let him scramble his 
    knee's off and wind up with squat.
    
    
    Steve

    If I were New England I'd try and trade the #1 pick for a few players 
    and/or draft picks, like Atlanta did last year.  The Pats could use help 
    in several areas.
    
    
    py

    � If I were a member of the Pat's front office, I'd find out who San
    � Fran is going to take with the #1 pick and pick him!
    
    If Raghib Ismail comes out early, he'll go first.   Do you want to see
    him in a Pats' uniform or a Niners' uniform ???
    
    Bob Hunt

    Re:198 Can you see Wilson throwing to Ismail???? Or Hodson throwing
    to Ismail? I can't... Trade the first pick like Atlanta did.....
    
    REK

    
    Do you thing San Fran would go with Iamail? I would think that
    they are looking for a future qb. It appears that Young is not 
    the predessor to the Montana throne, if all these allegations 
    are true. Ismail is not what the Pat's need. I was just trying 
    to light heartidly point out that the Pat's could use some help
    in fully utilizing thier #1 pick, like find out who San Fran would
    take, even though it may not be the person the Pat's need.
    In my opinion the Pat's need help in quite a few area's, first
    at offensive line, secondly they need a big hitting safety ala
    Atwater ,thirdly a pass rusher on the other side of Tippett and
    last but certainly not least another QB of the future! And if it's
    possible to trade for a coach that can show one iota of emotion,
    then they should also do that.
    
    
    
    
    Steve

 Steve, Atwater was just a flash in the pan you want a real hitter like
 Louie Oliver at safety....Pats can't draft a whole Oline at once so they
 should grap a RB who has enough speed to creat his own holes...

 mike

San Fran thinks that Joe can go for 2 years at least, and Bono could fill in
if he was really needed. I think they are looking toward a package deal. 1st 
pick + Players. Maybe 1st pick and Pats 1st pick last year.

The Niners are gonna need somebody to fill in for Lott do the Pats have a solid 
Safety ?
How about a big Pass blocker ?


Jeff 

    
    Mikey C.,
    
    	How do you come to the conclusion that Atwater is just a
    	flash in the pan?  Just curious........
    
    Claybroon

 Claybroon, what has he done this year? besides you know me any chance to
 STP(tm)...

 ;^)

 mike

    
    	Well, I recall him being hurt for one game.  I don't think
    	he missed any others.  He is the same steady player he was
    	last year.  I don't have any int. or tackle stats handy but
    	I'd bet he's the leader in tackles.....maybe number 2.  I
    	guess when your defense is a sieve, you can expect the strong
    	safety to lead in tackles eh?  :^)  He is probably the only
    	bright spot, IMHO, on the Denver D.
    
    	He also made that tremendous hit, which was recorded via
    	microphone by HBO, on Okoye!  That makes him All-World right?
    
    	Claybroon

    Pats need more than ONE player...Ismail isn't a bad idea, but I like
    the look of Detmer at BYU.  I suggest the Pats do a deal that let's
    them bid for (or perhaps play for) next year's draft picks as well.
    
    PJ

    I'd rather have McGwire from SDSU than Detmer... You can have Andre
    Ware if you want him...
    
    -Walt

    
    Both Detmer and Ismail are juniors who have thus far stated that
    they'll be returning for their senior years.  Count on it for Detmer,
    who because of his size and arm strength wouldn't be drafted in the 
    first two rounds, and probably not until much later.
    
    glenn

    FWIW, on a Heisman special Saturday night on ESPN, Mel Kiper said he
    thinks Ismail won't be back at ND for his senior season.
    
    Joe

Pats tried to sneak an O Guard through waivers (Sean Fanell ?  or 
something like that). I was in a big hurry and just scanned it. The
Donks picked him up. The guy was on IR, needs a shoulder Operation.
Evidently he had a similar problem with the other shoulder, and the
operation fixed him up fine. The Pats said this guy was probably the
second best O lineman they had, after Bruce Armstrong(?).He's a nine
year guy with some good credentials, and has played every position on
the line.

Does this mean the Donks' Officer Perry is finally history?

Mike JN

    	There was no attempt to "sneak" Sean through anything.  Farrell
    was making to much money and was deemed expendable as Victor trims
    the budget in an attempt to cut his losses before he runs.
    
    				/Don

    >	There was no attempt to "sneak" Sean through anything.  Farrell
    >was making to much money and was deemed expendable as Victor trims
    >the budget in an attempt to cut his losses before he runs.
    
    Exactly!  Except we're not talking cutting losses.  VIctor's hauling in
    TV money hand over fist and one day will sell the team at huge profit
    and may even move the team at huge profit.  They're doing what's right
    to keep the wallet full of green.
    
    Dan

    The official line is that the Pats were at the point of using up their
    roster moves without having to put a player through waivers.  They
    protected their younger guys and left Farrell exposed (at least he
    didn't expose himself).

    Re:212 Dan, your are full of sh*t! Farrell neds another shoulder 
    surgery afer thes eason is over. I know he passed the Denver physical
    but everyone says a real good hit on that shoulder and he is history
    for the year. He has even admitted to that FACT! The Pats may not be
    that best owners/players/coached in the NFL but I think they know when
    to "cut" a player who says he is ready but is not ready to play.,...
    
    REK

       Farrell didn't say he was 'ready'. The paper Tuesday quoted him as
    admitting he isn't ready to play, and will need post-season surgery. 
                                      Denny

    
    I really am not suprised by this move at all. Farrell has been 
    injured since he signed with the Pats! He's good but I am afraid
    that he may not be the same player after off-season surgery. 
    What sense does it make to keep an injured (maybe career threatening)
    offensive lineman that makes over 600K a year when your team is
    mired in it's worse season ever? You can argue the fact that the
    offensive line s*cks the big cahoona right now and Farrell would
    certainly help if he was healthy, but I feel that the Pat's are looking
    ahead and Farrell was not in thier plans. They would rather save
    the 600k to sign a young, un-injured, stud lineman for nexted 
    season, and also keep the younger lineman they now have and give
    them a shot. Of course I'm dreaming on this one! 8^) Of course Kiam
    is a cheap bastard who is just looking to make a few bucks by letting
    the Pats slip into oblivion so he can sell them out or move them
    to Tierra del Fuego.
    
    
    
    Steve

    But Digger, tell us how you *REALLY* feel about Victor!  :*)
    
    Lee

    
    I'd like to shave his haid with a "Lady Remington" then strip him 
    bare ass on the 50 yard line of Foxsullsahfer stadium and invite 
    every one to pelt him with nerf footballs. I'm mean, but I aint 
    that mean! 8^)
    
    
    
    
        
    Steve

    Steve, I would think that somehow, you could fit Roseanne Barr into
    that equation........
    
    HTH.
    
    Hawk

But then nobody'd know it was Victor under there.

[ In fact, they might not notice that there even WAS a person under
there ]

Mike JN

Somewhere in amidst the things that Steve suggested, I'd have
Roseanne Barr shave Vic's heiney with an epilator.  Then,
after it's all SMOOTH again, I'd have her apply some 
Mennon Skin Bracer, for a "cheek"-chilling experience....

OOOOoohhhh  YEAH!

'Saw

    Actually, 'Saw, that sounds like fun (in my book)!  Thanks for the
    variation, I mean, suggestion!
    
    Hawk

    
    Seen on the Worcester (MA) Telegram editorial page this past week:
    
             For Christmas:  The New England Patriots Action figure
    
                               (dead batteries not included)
    
    Dickstah
    

    From what I heard of the game on the radio, a copy of the game tape
    should be sent to the commish as evidence against the use of replay.

    5 replays in the game and most of them weren't close.
    
    John

    
    Heard on the radio that the Pat's game against the Giants this week is
    sold out.  I believe this is the first sellout at Shaeffer/Sullivan/
    Foxboro stadium (listed in the Guinness Book as "The World's Largest
    Urinal") this year.  Must be a helluva lot of Giants fans coming north
    since Giants/Meadowlands/Hoffa Memorial Stadium is always sold out.
    
    The last time I attended a Pats-Giants affair was at Harvard Stadium
    when the quarterbacks were Fran Tarkenton and maybe Joe Kapp.  It was
    windy as hell and nobody could kick or throw a football for any kind
    of reasonable accuracy.  Giants won something like 16-7, but I really
    don't remember the details.
    
    What was memorable were the hundreds of fights that went on in the
    stands between the lunatic souses supporting both teams.  Being a
    holiday weekend with temperatures hovering near the brandy-flask range,
    this will probably be no place for faint-hearted wimmen and
    impressionable children.
    
    How about a pool on how many different shirtless fans will be shown on
    the tee-vee during the game?
    
    Which reminds me, I don't even remember which game it was lasted
    weekend, but did anyone else see those guys in the stands wearing Santa
    suits?  One guy had a black eye, and he was so feces-visaged that his
    eyes were at half-mast and when he stood up it looked like he was in
    the middle of an earthquake.  Too funny.  He was escorted out shortly
    after that.  I hope someone he knows had a tape of the game, to show
    him what an ass he made of himself in front of a national audience.
    (Gee, if it was someone in this file, I hope I didn't embarrass you
    more than you already are.)
    
    Dickstah
    
    

�Must be a helluva lot of Giants fans coming north
�    since Giants/Meadowlands/Hoffa Memorial Stadium is always sold out.
    
    They may be coming east, west, and south as well.  New England seems to
    have a strong Giants following.  Channel 3, the CBS affiliate out of
    Hartford, always carries their games.
    
    I caught another sign of the lack of interest in the Pats this year
    (besides poor attendance).  Channel 22, the NBC affiliate in
    Springfield, MA, carried the Bills/Dolphins game last Sunday instead of
    the Pats/Jets.  My cable system in Worcester carries 22, which has been
    great since the Pats home games have been blacked out on the Providence
    and Boston channels.  It's been a long time since 22 hasn't shown a
    Pats game.

 Yeah Mac great move by 22. I was happy to watch that game because the Eagles/
 Cowboys game went south went Aikman got hurt too bad cause dallas' d played
 well enough to make a game of it.

 feceus-visaged tm that baby Dickstah...hahahaaaaa

 mike

    
    Before the start of the AFL, the Giants were the "home" team for New
    England football fans.  There are still plenty of 'em out there who
    still hold this allegiance.
    
    Personally, I find rooting for New York teams distasteful. 8^)
    
    Dickstah
    

    
    My brother was listening to WFAN in NY and heard a commercial that the
    _PATS_ put on the radio there, telling _Giants_ fans to make the trip
    to the game.
    
    I'm not sure whether I think that's smart or not...
    
    Bruce 

    I'm personally thrilled.  One of the things that's made this season
    depressing, besides the losing, has been a half-full Foxboro Stadium
    and the knowledge that the team is losing lots of money.
    
    It doesn't matter to me who the fans in the stands are cheering for as
    long as there are fans.  I also don't think it matters to the folks who
    count the money either - it's still revenue.  I'll probably be cursing
    and swearing on Sunday with the heaviest traffic we've faced all year
    but I don't really care.
    
    It was also a stroke of genius for the NFL to put the most attractive
    game on our schedule at the end of the season.  Only the Giants, 49ers
    or Bears could draw this kind of crowd this late in the season with the
    Patriots doing as badly as we are, and I also don't think either the
    Niners or Bears would have drawn a crowd like this.
    
    According to a piece in the Globe this morning, most of the tickets
    were sold before the season, probably quite a few to Giants fans.  The
    ads were placed in New York, New Jersey and Connecticut and I think it
    was smart.  Both the Giants and Jets are sold out on a season basis and
    it's one of the few chances Giants fans will have to see their team
    live at a place that's a convenient drive and at a place that has lots
    of tickets available.
    
    We've done a lot wrong this season and it's nice to see something good
    happen.
    
    John

    re .231:
    
    Gotta agree 100% with your first paragraph John; the huge number of
    empty seats is almost as disheartening as the play on the field.
    
    
    py