Conference misery::feline_v1

    Well, I've had the same thing happen for about the  passed two months.
    Callie & Tabitha like each other (Love each other actually) and they 
    play together a lot, but sometimes Callie (4 months) is a bit rough on
    my little petite Tabitha(one year). Tabitha became withdrawn to a
    point. she still played w/ callie & stuff, but was less "people
    oriented". Lately, she's been back to her old self, and actually gives
    callie a run for her money sometimes. I do still have to break them up
    when they'rre "playing" too rough, and Callie seeems to get retalitory
    for Tabithas liking. Tabitha CAN take care of herself, she's just a 
    bit laid back.
    
    I'd be interested in hearing other experiences, and wish the base noter
    luck!!
    
    Bonnie

    This note hits home!  I know I've written in here before that my
    newcomer, Taja, about 11 months old now, is a devil, not in disguise
    either!!  He dominates and the other cats let him.  I know he will
    mellow out with age; for now he simply gets a lot of discipline when he
    instigates too much fun and games.  One thing my husband and I did
    notice, though, is that a lot of the times Kelsey has approached Taja
    to play and then wimps out when Taja gets too rough for him.  He goes
    into hissy fits and runs away whining.  So, now I try to watch who does
    the instigating and if it is Kelsey, not scold Taja for it.
    
    I was going to bring in a young kitten for Taja to play with and then
    rethought that idea since Taja is almost an adult himself.  Then, he'll
    mellow out and the new kitten will need a new kitten and pretty soon
    I'd be way over my feline limit!!  So, I decided to bring in a new boy
    halfway between the age of Kelsey and Taja.  He's used to a houseful of
    cats and seems pretty adaptable.  Hopefully, this won't make matters
    worse.  Only time will tell!!
    

       Although the following was a statement made relative to the Canine
    species, I think it could easily relate to the Felines as well....
    
    
         "It's not the size of the Dog in a fight, it's the size of the
    fight in the Dog that counts.."
    
    JM

    We had Pippin and Gino for 4 years before we got Stitch.  Gino weighs
    between 12-1/2 13 lbs and Pippin is about 10.  They could have weighed
    100 lbs each and it wouldn't have mattered to Stitch at all.  From the
    very first day he took over.  He'd hopp up to Pippins favorite spot and
    she'd batt him off and he'd just climb back up again until she got sick
    of it and gave up her space.  He'd walk over to Gino and push his face
    out of the food dish - Gino would batt him away and make some serious
    threatening sounds but Stitch kept it up until Gino gave up the dish. 
    This tenatious behavior applied to everything Stitch did.  It's eased
    up a little over the last 2 years but he still rules the roost.  They
    all really get along beautifully but the little Sh!! just established
    himself from day one and the pecking order got changed.
    
    No - it's not the size of the animal at all - it's the attitude.
    
    Giudi +3
    

    
       REF: .04	
             	
             THAT'S IT, that's what happening with my cats, the little    	
             is sort of taking over one example he took over the bed my 
             older cat is not allowed to come and sleep on the bed soon 
             has he jump on the bed the little one start nagging him until
             he leaves, I cannot beleive that my older cat is such a big
             wimp, I hope everything is going to get better I'm missing not
             having my older cat not sleeping with us.

    re .5, I doubt things will change.  My Jessica is 8 years old and
    has been bringing up kittens (none of whom have made it to year-old
    cats through various illnesses - 6 of them) for years.  Then last
    fall Alexander came into her (our) life.  A ball of black fluff
    who just wanted to be held and petted constantly.  After the first
    two weeks of hissing at him, Jessica began to accept - altho' not
    like - him.  That little ball of fluff has turned into one of the
    worst hellions you have ever seen.  Jessica was always queen of
    the roost through all other kittens.  But now she cowers to
    Alexander.  He chases her and the fighting can get rough.  He
    has her completely terrorized.  The water bottle is no longer
    doing any good.  When my husband got out of the hospital last
    week - Alexander bit him and it got badly infected, so the
    doctor popped him in for 5 days of 24-hour intravenous penicillin
    feeding - we had a serious discussion about whether Alexander will
    remain with us.  He was just neutered a couple of months ago and
    we're waiting a bit longer to see if he will calm down.  But I
    also ask myself is it fair to cat #1, Jessica, to live in fear
    of him?  Or will he eventually mellow to the point where they
    can live in the same house peacably without the fur flying
    constantly? 
    
    So if your older cat has taken second place, I doubt whether that
    behavior will change.  But I hope I'm wrong.
    
    Laura
     

    Laura, I think that Alex will mellow out.  Give him time.  Years ago I
    took in TK, a stray tomcat who dominated the neighborhood.  He would
    frequently terrorize my 2 neutered males.  I finally got hold of TK and
    got him fixed and he ended up to me the mellowest, mushiest cat I have
    ever had.  He's a real love now and a big coward!  So, give Alex time. 
    It takes awhile for those boys to become men...errr, I mean its!!
    

             REF: .6
    	            	
        	That is terrible what is happening to you I hope I'm         	
                not going to get the same problem.
                                                  	
                Well my older cat is getting push around by the little one                                       	
                but they still play together, I just feel guilty to have
                brought a new kitten who took is thron,but I think he'll
                get use to it with time.

    re.5
    
    There was also some confustion about sleeping arrangements when Stitch
    took over but then that mellowed out as well.  We had to take some
    responsibility on our part as well - if he chased the other one(s) off
    the bed then we would go and collect them and put them back on.  Now
    each has his/her special spot - and sometimes they just like to sleep
    some place else.  My Gino is much more passive than his sister is about
    things - he's the 13 lb. Siamese wimp!
    
    Giudi

    What I've found is that there are different sleeping arrangements
    so that everyone has time to cuddle.  My two older ones
    own the bed at night (Holly doesn't let LB on), but on the
    weekend days or rare occasions when I'm home during the day weekdays
    the two odler ones sleep in the living room and LB gets the bed.
    After a year and a half things are slowlyyyyy mellowing out so
    that all three are in the bedroom in the morning, LB usually
    perched on a window sill watching for birds, which Holly wouldn't
    let him do before.
    

    Re: Alex
    
    If this behaviour persists for another couple of months, you might
    ask your vet about a hormone shot (one time) for Alex;  this worked
    wonders with my Pussycat, who was originally feral and didn't
    "relax' even after neutering.
    

    I'm in the same boat with TaiTai (13 lb. Siamese) and Figaro (a 5# ball
    of energy).   This is the second stray we have brought in for Tai to
    adopt.  The first one was female and 3-4 weeks old.. "Chiggar" was so
    pathetic that softie Tai just couldn't resist.  Chiggar nursed on Tai's
    front foot (even at 5 years old Chiggar in times of stress or fatigue
    would do the same thing).  We lost Chiggar to diabetes and were happy
    with one cat.  Tai is 10 and the most placid, loving, laidback cat I
    have ever seen.  But, fate stepped in and on a long vacation weekend
    found this little black abandoned waif hiding on the deck.  Verified it
    was a stray (check in office said a whole litter was left and one by
    one they were either hit or found dead by people.  We brought "Figaro"
    home (first stop vet) and Tai took one look and took to the top of my
    kitchen cabinets.  We have been through severe diahreah (sp?) which has
    finally cleared up thanks to the suggestions from noters (albon did it)
    but Figaro has been giving Tai a run for his money.  Tai has a slight
    heart problem and I worried that the "Hell bent for election" races
    through the house were stressful to Tai.  According to the vet, on the
    contrary.  Last check up he went from a class 3 to a class 1 problem
    (don't understand but the vet was impressed).  But Figaro beats up on
    Tai all the time....so right now Figgie is at the vets to be neutered
    and front declawed.  This way Tai has a fighting chance (when Figgie
    got feisty Tai simply sat on him).  Will pick Figgie up after work and
    hope the neutering will calm him down some.