| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 1004.1 | | SIMUL8::RAVAN | I got my facts blurrin' | Mon Jan 04 1988 08:54 | 15 |
| I think you're already a candidate for the "Saint Francis" award;
you've given a tormented kitten eleven happy years that he wouldn't
have had.
As for the decision - it is a tough one, and only you can make it.
My opinion would be that as long as *all* of you are leading happy,
fulfilled lives, keep on as you are; but if it gets to the point
where keeping Blackie comfortable is draining the energy from everyone
else, it might be kinder to let him go instead of working yourself
to desperation.
In any event, someone who cares for animals as much as you must
will certainly do the right thing.
-b
|
| 1004.2 | Bless you | 32096::BURLEW | Purr is my favorite sound! | Mon Jan 04 1988 12:01 | 7 |
| Bless you for taking Blackie from the shelter and for loving him
enough to care for him now. I'd keep on caring for him unless he
seems to be in pain or unhappy. But, as .1 said, only you can make
the decision.
Ande, Sherlock and Serena's mom
|
| 1004.3 | The "right" thing | RATTLE::LANDRY | | Mon Jan 04 1988 12:16 | 21 |
| You must be on heck of a person to have given so much (and still
are) to that poor baby.
My opinion (like everybody else said, it's your decision) I would
put the little sweetie down. I own 2 beautiful babies, and I have
certain "rules". If one should ever not be able to
eat, take care of bodily functions, or is in pain, I have made up
my mind that I would put my kitty out of its misery, even tho it
will kill me.
You say that Blackie purrs, etc, but a vet once told me, an animal
can take alot of pain before you even know it is hurting. So even
tho Blackie seems to be happy, maybe he/she is putting up with the
pain because he/she doesn't want to let you down. Don't we wish
they could talk??
Well, you are going to need all the support you can get, and I hope
that you can find it in your heart to do the "right" thing. So
far, you did a wonderful job, so I am sure the decision you make
will be the "right" thing. My prayers are with you.
|
| 1004.4 | | AIMHI::UPTON | | Mon Jan 04 1988 13:48 | 18 |
|
I think what you have done in the past and are doing today are
admirable. The only question I would ask myself in this situation
is - does Blackie still have quality of life. If he is in a
separate room without the other cats and you for hours, is he
really happy? As far as purring goes - cats who have been hurt
badly and in terrible pain will purr. It does not mean they are
content and happy. We too had to make a decision with our 16 yr.
old male - it was painful and we still miss me, but he wouldn't
have lived a good life the way he was. Only you can make the
decision, but really soul search that what you are doing is the
best for Blackie and not that you hate to let him go. Remember,
if you love me - let him go.
Our thoughts are with you...
|
| 1004.5 | | AIMHI::UPTON | | Mon Jan 04 1988 13:49 | 8 |
|
re 1004.4
Sorry slip of the fingers - should have wrote:
If you love HIM - let him go.
|
| 1004.6 | | VAXWRK::DUDLEY | | Mon Jan 04 1988 14:44 | 25 |
| Hi Martha! I'm sorry to hear about Blackie, he is such a sweetie. How
soon after your relocation to Europe did this begin? I'm just
wondering if the stress of the move was the instigator? How do
you determine mental incompetence anyway, beyond symptoms? Are
there any scientific means? How does the vet know that Blackie's
incontinence is due to mental, as opposed to physical, deteriora-
tion?
If you were still living in Stow, I would be happy to cat-sit for
Blackie and pick up after him, after all, it would only be a little
worse than what he used to do when you went away. (-:
I think that if you really think that Blackie is still happy and
enjoying his life, you should continue with what you are doing until
you feel the time has come when you can no longer continue. You will
know when that time arrives, just as I believe you will know, if or
when the time arrives, when Blackie is no longer happy with this
arrangement. Either way, I know it's futile to say you should not
feel guilty whatever the decision, it seems inevitable for those who
go the furthest 'above and beyond the call of duty' (as would most of
the members of this conference). Try to be consoled with the know-
ledge that you have done and will do what is best for Blackie.
Best Wishes,
Donna
|
| 1004.7 | FEELINGS | AIMHI::OFFEN | | Mon Jan 04 1988 14:57 | 7 |
| I understand the dilemma you are in and the feelings that must be
tearing you apart. You are ONE HECK OF A LADY. Blackie has had
eleven beautiful years with you. You WILL make the right decision,
whichever it is.
Sandi
|
| 1004.8 | | BUSY::MAXMIS11 | Serendipity 'R' us | Mon Jan 04 1988 15:57 | 8 |
|
If you listen to the kitty, he will tell you when the time comes.
My Missy was over twenty years old when she said "Mom, it's time".
I went thru a similar heart tug of war for some time before she
told me. Then my course became clear. That's how I know that I
was not a minute too early or late.
Marion
|
| 1004.9 | I'm serious about this | VAXWRK::SKALTSIS | Deb | Mon Jan 04 1988 16:34 | 9 |
| Martha,
There was an article in one of the cat magazines several years ago
about a breeder in NY whose shouse was furnished with antiques and
persian rugs. She diapered the cats. Honest.
If Blackie is otherwise OK, why not give it a try?
Deb
|
| 1004.10 | | SHIRE::CEHRS | | Tue Jan 05 1988 07:11 | 11 |
| .9
Deb,
I cannot try to put diapers on Blackie. He only has partial control
over his hindlegs (which means his walk is very wobbly and keeping
the equilibrium is sometimes hard for him) and this would definitely
impair the little control he has. Besides, all our chinese carpets
and a great deal of our furniture (sofas, armchairs, etc.) have
already taken a real beating from his "behaviour" before he was
confined to one room. Thanks anyhow.
Martha
|
| 1004.11 | You're doing great! | CYGNUS::KENNEY | | Tue Jan 05 1988 09:42 | 14 |
| Martha,
My feeling is that you are a wonderful owner and have found an
acceptable solution to your problem. As long as Blackie is happy,
I would just continue what you are doing. If he gets along well
with your other cat, perhaps you could leave them both in the room
together and Blackie will have more company than your visits.
Perhaps another area of the house would be less of a problem to
keep clean -- like a bathroom, perhaps, with Blackie's bed and toys.
Good luck.
Elizabeth
|
| 1004.12 | You're doing fine | 31093::WASH | Enjoying the experience | Thu Jan 14 1988 03:39 | 16 |
| Hi Martha.
Sounds to me like you're doing the "right thing" already - in other
words, I echo the votes already cast in this topic. I tend to agree
with Marion's reply (.8), listen to and observe Blackie, he will
give you better advice than we could. It may seem bizarre to the
non-pet owner, but we all know that our pets can communicate to
us in a language inherent in our relationship to them. You have
grown attached to Blackie and can "read" his responses, I think
you will know if/when it's time to let him go.
Until such a time, enjoy the company and companionship that he
offers - if it becomes a burden to sustain his life, then consider
the alternatives. Sounds to me like Blackie has lived a fruitful
existence in your care, so be content with all your future decisions
regarding him.
Marvin
|