Conference turris::womannotes-v3

    
    Mmm, earrings...In my teens and early twenties - not so long ago - I 
    just LOVED earrings. Especially the really strange ones. Like: little 
    frying pans with eggs, tiny aquariums with fish swimming around, little 
    toilets (the seats would open!), telephones, earth globes... They were 
    usually a good conversation starter. :)
    
    I've become more conservative though. Now I'll wear more expensive but 
    less striking jewelry. My need for spectacular attributes is not so 
    large anymore. Unfortunately, my ear lobes tend to get infected even 
    when I wear silver or gold earrings, so I usually wear clips nowadays. 
    Which are not as nice looking as the pierced ones most of the time...
    
    And they get in the way when you're on the phone!
    
    Ann

    
    i had no intention of getting my ears peirced.  i was too scared of how
    it might hurt. until i was visiting my mom about 7 yrs ago (i was 27)
    and she wanted to get hers done *so* bad, but she was afraid. so we
    made a pact, if i would, she would.
    
    i stopped wearing earrings in those holes about 6 or 7 months ago. i
    don't know if the holes have closed up now or not. while i was wearing
    earrings though, i could only wear the post kind. i found that anything
    dangling beyond the lobe would have my hair wrapped around it and tied
    into knotts in nano-seconds. 
    
    ~r

    
    I LOVE wearing earrings!
    
    I had my ears pierced when I was 17, and have never regretted it.
    I got them re-pierced (four holes now) when I was 21.
    
    My earring collection is a direct reflection of me and my moods
    - playful, sophisticated, delicate, chunky, symbolic, sexy, whatever.
    They seem to say a lot about you, especially to other women if you're
    wearing symbols of some kind. 
    
    I was talking to a 40-year old woman in the hairdressers the other
    week - she was considering doing it for the first time - and I was
    surprised at the fervour with which I tried to persuade her to go
    ahead. 
    Clips pinch, and I always lost more clip earrings than I kept.
          
    'gail                        
    
    

I wear earcuffs (thanx to a sister womannoter, who gave me my first pair).
	Mez

    I got my ears pierced at 11, when it was the "in thing" with my
    friends.  After hearing one of their tongue-in-cheek extravagant tales
    of your ear being pulled out six feet long and their taking a pitchfork
    with gleaming tines and punching it through your ear again and again, I
    went to the jewelry store and they used a combination
    hole-punch/staple-gun and did it quick and clean.  I wore earrings for
    several years, but had problems with infections and rashes until I 
    discovered my ears best tolerate Gold earrings (like 14K).  
    
    I lost most of my earrings in college when my apartment was robbed, and
    didn't wear earrings much again until about....three weeks ago.  Really,
    after a while the holes don't close up, they just await your whimsy.  
    
    I don't go for gaudy earrings, mostly small hoops and simple posts.  I only
    have about 5 pairs, but they're enough.  
    
    -Jody
    

    
    For those of you who get infected earlobes, try stainless steel posts. 
    They usually don't bother me.  
    
    I really like earrings and have several pair but I almost never wear 
    most of them!  When I'm not earing the showier earrings that I have, 
    I wear tiny silver studs.
    
    My grandmother re-opened her holes after about a 50-year hiatus by
    pushing a straw from a straw-broom through.  (Her ears were pierced
    when she was a girl, because someone thought it would improve her 
    eyesight...)  
    
    CQ

    
    Re. .4
    
    Thanks Mez - forgot to mention the cuffs!
    
    Beautiful things - in combination with other earrings or alone.
                          

    
    Where does one buy ear cuffs?  My sister-in-law doesn't want
    to get her ears pierced but likes ear cuffs.  I wanted to get
    her some for her birthday and haven't been able to locate them.
    
    also, does one buy a pair of ear cuffs or just one?
    
    thanks

    I got mine pierced for the first time at 14 and that triggered
    something in my body such that from then on I couldn't wear ANY
    jewelry anywhere without triggering the contact dermatitis rash.
    I can hear Lorna gasping in horror!  :>  After a painful and 
    difficult year, the holes closed.  The jewelry sensitivity remained.  
                                          
    In college I got them pierced again, (always by a doctor), and 
    discovered the joys of Epsom salts in calming the reactions.  Now 
    I have 4 holes and a prescription for hydrocortisone and that lets 
    me wear earrings at least some of the time.  The upper holes are ex-
    tremely sensitive and it's very rare I can go more than an hour with
    anything in them.  They've been open for about 10 years so they're
    well "healed" and should be able to tolerate earrings.  Even right now 
    I have a slight reaction but for me, that's just life.  Real gold 
    doesn't matter, (regardless of the karat composition), surgical steel 
    doesn't matter, even the hypoallergenics break me out. I tried the 
    clear nailpolish route and those special earrings that were hollow 
    tubes with holes in them to "clean out" the tunnels.  What's finally 
    worked is dipping my earring posts or wires into the cortisone before 
    putting them in and I can go nearly all day before the itch starts.  
    Underlying tension will break me out dispite my best efforts.
    
    I saw this black woman once with a short 'fro and earrings right up and
    over the arch.  I think I counted 7 holes/ear.  It was gorgeous and if
    I only could...  But my ears would drop off, I'm sure!  ;-)
    
    I've seen in magazines over the last couple of years, ads for earrings
    that are "guaranteed" to not cause a reaction.  Anyone tried them?  I'd
    sure like to give that company a run for its money!  I absolutely love
    wearing earrings and I think they look great on anyone - male and
    female.  Remember George Michael when he had long hair and two
    earrings, (3 day growth and tight jeans)?  Yowsa!!

I have two holes in my left earlobe that I wear two small silver hoops
in, and one hole in my right earlobe that I wear a long wild dangly in
(sometimes even two in the same hole).

My earrings very much reflect my Self.  Silver is my connecting color,
the two hoops symbolize inner and outer wholeness, and if I wear some-
thing in the other ear it's always very long, ornate, and bizarre.

For some reason I find matching earrings on others _VERY_ awkward!

Carla

    Earrings are fun!  
    
    I mostly wear geometric ones but I do have one pair I love that's a cat
    stretched out resting on a circle.
    
    I used to have a problem with metal allergy, but it's stopped for the
    most part.  (Cheap earrings caused some of it, I'm sure.)  One thing
    that nobody's mentioned yet is plastic post sheaths -- they're great! 
    You can buy them at earring stores -- just put the plastic sheath over
    the post and it protects your ear from direct contact with the metal. 
    There are plastic backs to go with them.  
    
    Pam

re: Victoria (.8)

Where I've gotten my ear-cuffs: from a =wn= with too many, from a funky Indian
jewlery store in San Francisco, from various stores in Provincetown (many of
the stores have them there; jewelry stores, wymmin's stores, and there's a
great tacky jewelry store on the road to the dock with tons of them), from a
gay/lesbian book store in Washington DC, from a catalog for imported clothing
(Indian, Phillipino type cotton clothing). I've seen them in several catalogs,
but usually only one or two styles.

I have just one of each of my ear cuffs. I don't remember ever seeing anyone
wear a matched pair, but maybe I haven't been looking too hard.
	Mez

    I have 2 holes in each ear, and I never leave home without earrings.  I
    usually wear dangling ones.  I especially like antique Victorian
    earrings.  I usually wear 14K gold, silver or gold-filled since costume
    jewelry often infects my ears.  I have no idea how many pairs I have -
    maybe 30 or 40 ?, but only a few are 14K.  
    
    I also like earrings on men and wish more men wore them.
    
    Lorna
    

    re: .9  "...guaranteed not to itch...."
    
    I've got one of those that was given to me by a friend who lost the
    other. It didn't bother her and it doesn't bother me... (Of course,
    I could stick rosin core solder thru my ear and it's not likely to
    bother me!)
    
    Worth trying if you really want to wear earrings...
    
    Edd

    
    There are so called non-reactive earings. They do help!
    	
    Some tricks I've learned, clean the earings and sterilize in alcohol
    frequently.  The posts do build up salts and other bad stuff.  They
    look better if clean anyway.  Peroxide is also helpful in cleaning
    the holes in the ears.
    	
    Watch for cheap materials or plated/coated metals.  The nasty materials
    are copper, nickel, and alloys containing chromium.  Stainless steel
    does have nickel in it and reacts on most people, look for surgical
    steel which is a very different alloy.
    	
    Gold plate is the worst as the under plate is usually copper, nickel,
    or both.  The plating is porous and the underplating will migrate to
    the surface and cause problems.
    
    Safe metals, no guarantees though.
    	
    	Gold over 12k but, watch what it's alloyed with.  Frequently
    	copper or nickel is added for color and durability.  12k is
    	about 50% gold, it's the other 50% and there ratios that make
    	a difference.
    
    	Platinum, non-reactive for most all. Expensive and hard to find.
    	
    	Rhodium, hard to find almost blackish color. Looks good for
    	some jewlery.  
        
    	Titanium, used on pacemakers and internal pumps. Very non-reactive
    	and used for some brands of non-itch earing posts.  The material
    	is anodized for its finish (blues, violets, and pinks are
   	predominent).  Moderate in cost.
    
    	Tantalum, an aluminum alloy that is anodized to make it
    	non-reactive and to provide the colorful beauty.  Look is similar
    	to titainium but cheaper.
    	Silver, though it does tarnish is is surprizingly non-reactive
    	on many people.
    
    	Plastic there are some brands that have plastic posts, try
    	different ones as platics differ and on may react others may
    	not.
    	
    Hope some of this helps...
    	
    a-

You betcha eagles. That's the beauty of it. They aren't uncomfortable at all,
and for those not into body mutilation :-), they're an alternative. They just
slip over the high, small part of your outer ear, and hang out toward the
bottom, through gravity.
    
    
>    ~--e--~  eagles view nudity of feet and ears as being more natural

I don't know that I'd stop with feet and ears :-).
	Mez    

    I love earrings. Unfortunately, I lost all of mine (along with all
    other jewellary) when I was moving home after school. It wasn't much
    in terms of money, but it was a few years collection and i was very
    unhappy. I haven't bought any after that. I find them very expensive
    here and just can't bring myself to spend that money.
    
    I want to get another set of holes. i think about it often but I'm too
    scared to do it. My ears were pierced when i was a baby.
    
    manisha
    

    I essentially pierced my own ears in college. I had a pair of 'sleepers'
    that gradually pierce the ear, and after two weeks, I took them out
    to put 'studs' in. One went in nicely but the other ear  wasn't
    completely pierced so I finished the job with a needle and an ice cube.
    
    Normally I don't change my earings, I wear a pair of small gold hoops
    that I keep on day and night.
    
    Bonnie

    Some of my friends tease me that with my hair so long, I must
    be saving my ears for piercing "at my mid-life crisis".  Dunno
    if they're right.  Haven't really thought about it yet.
    
    I *do* like buying earrings for special friends, when I know 
    they like to wear same.
    
    DougO

    re .16, Steve, I just happen to think earrings look attractive on
    some men, that's all, and since I'd rather look at something I find
    attractive than not, I wish more men wore them.  It's certainly
    no big deal.  There are many other things I'd change about the way
    most men do things before I'd worry about who wears earrings, if
    I had my way!!
    
    As to your comparison between feet and ears, most people wear shoes
    most of the time but most people don't wear ear-muffs, so I guess
    I just don't get it.....   I think clothing and jewelry enhances
    the appearance of the majority of people.  There are a few people
    who look beautiful naked, but when I consider the majority of the
    population I'm glad clothes, as well as jewelry, were invented.
    
    Lorna
    

    I pierced my ears in high school, and wore small gold hoops or studs
    until I had my son.  During his infancy they came out (he tried to grab
    them once too often), never to go back in, and the holes have now 
    healed over.  At this point, most jewelry just feels like too much trouble.
    
    Alison

	Right now I am going through one of my long "can't wear metal"
	times - is in now in month 3.  So I can't ware my ear cuffs or
	other jewerly which I love.

	My collection of ear cuffs come from Kansas City, Denver, Boston,
	various craft fairs, Native America shops and randon people.
	The extent of my collection is dropping again to under 10 - I
	give them away to people who like them.  (I only give away the
	ones I have bought not the ones bought for me as a gift.)

	This weekend I discovered that I have a reaction to the polish
	I use to clean silver - I have to look for another brand to
	use.

	When I could wear contacts I bought an over the ear dangle that
	I would absolutely love to wear.  Glasses makes it difficult.

	I am always on the look out for interesting jewerly in silver and
	gold, especially ear cuffs.

	When I was in the Seattle area in May, I saw a good number of
	men with earrings - mostly younger men.  I think that on some
	men they look real good - especially if they are subtle.

	_peggy

		(-)
		 |
			Self adronment and expression is great fun.
	

    at what age would you pierce a child's ears?  I have seen infants with
    pierced earrings.  I have also myself seen one accident, and one result
    of an accident, that involved motion-with-momentum and hair caught in
    an earring.  The end result of these was certainly not life
    threatening, but most folks don't want a tiny piece of pie permanently
    removed from their earlobe...
    
    My 8-yr-old has been asking to have her ears pierced ("I'm the only one
    in my class who doesn't have ...", and also she's into dresses and
    jewelry when she thinks of it) but I have so far said not till you're
    older.  Opinions?  Am I being a stick-in-the-mud here?
    
    I myself hardly ever wear anything but pearl studs, I save the others
    for Occasions or Fun Days.  I like hoops (the old hippie in me peeks
    out) and love the feel of dangly earrings.  I like the kind that are
    long loops of wire, with nothing to fasten, but those are easier to
    lose.

    My mom thought pierced ears were for sluts and would NOT let me get
    mine done in high school. Therefore the first semester away at college I
    had my roommate pierce mine with a needle and an iceicle from outside
    the window of our room. I then went off on a 2 week tour with the
    college orchestra and got an ear infection that was unbelievably
    painfull and made the trip less than fun. My earlobe was so swollen it
    stuck out. Then I went home and had to explain to my mom! Not a
    pleasant experience (I still haven't told her about the tatoo :*))

    Now I love dangly earings with plain silver hoops being my default when
    my more exotic earrings seem too much. I've never been able to wear
    posts without getting an infection but wires don't cause a problem.
    Since I have long hair I've had the problem of occaisionally getting an
    earing caught in my brush and pulling it out. It's never hurt my ear
    though my mom told me all sorts of horror stories about people ripping
    their ears or their earlobes dropping down and looking ugly.

    I like men with a single earring and long hair. And I probably drove
    poor Carla crazy, I always wear matched pairs. ;*) liesl

    When my daughter was born I decided I wouldn't get her ears pierced
    until she asked me for it.  Last year, at age 4, she decided she wanted
    to start wearing earrings.  So one day we went down to the nearest mall
    and got her ears pierced.  The way I looked at it, her ears would
    probably heal more quickly the younger she is and she'd be more likely
    to sit still for the actual piercing if it was something she really
    wanted.  I also had no problem with her taking care of her ears.  One
    of them did get infected at one point and she fussed a little when I
    cleaned it but all-in-all it was a very positive experience for both of
    us.  The only place I draw the line is that I won't let her wear
    "dangly" earrings until she's older.  For now it's studs and small
    hoops only.  
    
    Nanci

Oooh, I *love* earrings.

I don't go in for jewelry in a big way (I wear one small silver ring and one
thin silver chain at all times, in addition to my watch) by I *love* earrings.
Big, little, wild, mellow, everything.  Never met an earring I didn't like.

I love earcuffs, but I don't have any because I can't find them.  A friend of
mine has a piece of jewelry that I don't know the name of, but it is in the
shape of a dragon which wraps around the back of the ear and curves in front
on the top...very nice.  Looks like a hearing aid, but prettier.  :-)

I just got a third piercing, in my right ear, and it is in the process of
healing, so I keep a small stainless steel stud in it at all times.  The
other two holes are often empty, or filled with tiny gold hoops which I
wear for days, because I am too lazy to put in "real" earrings.

I plan to get my right ear pierced all the way up to the top, and wear small
stainless (or silver) bead rings.  But I am very scared of the cartiledge
piercing because it is supposed to be very painful.

I got my ears pierced when I was about 13, with my mother's blessing.  I
don't approve of parent's having their small children's ears pierced.  I
think the decision to modify one's body should be made by each individual,
not by parents.  (See "Little People")  As for the person that got her
four year old's ears pierced when she (the child) requested it, I think
that is great - I would *not* let a child get hir ears pierced (or anything
else) until I was sure that s/he would take proper care of the piercing,
but if I though s/he could handle that respondibility, then it is hir
choice to make about hir body.

I think pierced ears on men is very sexy.  I think extra piercings (ears)
are sexy on everyone, if done tastefully.

D!

    I love earrings and the only way to keep them is with pierced ears.
    I have two holes in each ear.  Usually wear a 14K stud in the back hole
    (all the time) and vary the front earring daily.  Sometimes when I buy
    earrings I choose the pairs on the basis of what works with what.
    
    Once I had three woman roommates and we installed a "retail store" type
    of rack in the bathroom.  Had over 200 pairs to choose from each day. 
    Sheer heaven. (Dipped each earring in isopropyl alcohol before putting
    it back on rack.)
    
    As for kids, I'd say not until they are old enough to care for the hole
    themselves.
    
    'Sis funny, my Mom thought pierced ears were for sluts and immigrants. 
    She had a conniption when I got my ears pierced when I was in college. 
    When I got the _second_ set of holes she reacted as if I'd had an
    operation to reduce my IQ.  Sigh.
    
    I think many men look wonderful with an earring. Why d'ya think they
    call small earrings "studs?"    :^)
    
        Margaret 
    

    	I don't remember when I started asking my mom to let me get my
    ears pierced, but she kept refusing.  Then my grandmother had hers
    pierced, so mom figured if she could do it, we could too.  So for my
    ninth birthday present I got my ears pierced.  After freshman year in 
    college, I decided to get a second set of holes.

    	I usually wear studs in the upper hole, and longer danglies or
    hoops in the bottom hole.  Sometimes I'll just wear one set or wear
    just one earring the the upper hole.  I also have an ear cuff I 
    sometimes wear.  (Actually, I hadn't worn it in ages, and just 
    "rediscovered it".  Now I'd like to find some others!)

    	I think I'm pretty lucky in that I can usually wear any types
    of earrings.  I hate the real heavy ones though - those bother me.  
    I think earrings are a nice accent - and can be really funky
    sometimes, too.  My old college roommate swore she'd never get her
    ears pierced...but when I last talked to her, she had gone and
    done it!

    	When I was in NYC a couple weekends ago, some of the vendors
    had these *really* long earrings - "Shoulder bumpers", I think they
    were called.  I've never actually seen anyone wear them quite 
    *that* long though.

    	As for guys with earrings....on some it looks wonderful (and
    incredibly sexy!).  But I've also seen some guys with an earring
    which just didn't look right.

    	amy

Re: .16

    RE: Lorna and wishing more men wore earrings ... WHY ???  Since
    outside of Digital people in the real world often make all sorts
    of negative assumptions about men wearing earrings  ...

Gee eagles, *whatever* "negative assumptions" are you talking about? Would that
be that men who wear earrings are either gay or effiminate or both? Surely YOU
don't think that either of those things are negative...

Please be a little gentle here. Some of us men who wear earrings are GLAD that
there are people like Lorna who appreciate it. Please don't discourage them.
Besides, some us LIKE playing with bigots' heads.

> eagles view nudity of feet and ears as being more natural

Well I'm sitting here barefoot with one earring. Does that get � credit?

	-- Charles

    
<Well I'm sitting here barefoot with one earring. Does that get � credit?
<
<	-- Charles
<
    Well, it certainly does with me. ;*) liesl

    I was 30 when I had my ears pierced and haven't look back once.  I love
    to wear one long earring only or two odd.  Up until a short time ago I
    went to a designer who made them out of porcelain and painted them to
    match my shirts.  One was always long, the other shorter, all were
    weird shapes.  She (sob sob) is no longer in business, so I'm always on
    the lookout for weird and wonderful.  Thank goodness for Colorado
    Springs in May (^'
    
    My 20 year old has five holes in one ear and three in the other.  She
    wears studs and small hoops in them, sometimes all at once, or two at a
    time.
    
    Love seeing men with a small hoop or stud in one ear.  But somebody
    said it right, seems to suit only some men, like long hair.
    
    ...dale

    I have three - hmm, started to say three holes per ear... aha!  I've
    had each ear pierced three times.  Now I usually wear LARGE earrings so
    one per ear usually does it.
    
    aq
    

    I have two holes per ear.  I like to wear studs/smaller earrings in the
    top hole and larger earrings in the bottom.  I have about 4 pairs of
    the "shoulder duster" earrings.  I love them!!
    
    BJ has picked out the last few pairs (for Mother's Day) of earrings and I
    think they are great.  Jim doesn't seem to like them though.
    
    Roberta

    
    I had my earrings when I was 6. If somemeone wants to get holes into her
    ears at age of 4, why not? 
    
    Tuula
    

    
    Just another vote for men wearing an earring.......
    Or two - in the same ear......
    Or tiny studs, or a combination of the two......
    Has been known to cause violent palpitations of my heart.
                           
    I too wish more men would consider it - I've seen very few that
    it didn't suit.
                                                    
    'gail

    Well, there's at least one man here (me) who doesn't wear earrings
    simply because he doesn't particularly care for jewelry of any sort.
    
    --- jerry

    funny how and when things happen...
    
    yesterday after work I picked up kids and (big) dog and went swimming
    at a friend's lake.  As I was changing into my suit, I thought about
    taking my earrings -- the aforementioned pearl posts -- off, then said
    'nah, posts are ok!' and off we went.  Well the dog swam up to me as I
    floated on a tube, and in snuffling and licking my face she managed to
    lick the ^&#($^&@) earring right off my right ear!  I have the back but
    not the pearl!  Stop laughing!
    
    so this earring is either (a) embedded in lake bottom, or (b) my dog
    swallowed it.  Sigh.
    
    so I guess I'll let my daughter get her ears pierced for some special
    occasion in the relatively near future.  As others have pointed out, if
    she's old enough to ask, she can probably learn to take care of them
    herself.  At least as well as her mother does!
    
    		^   ^
    	       +  |  +
    		\___/

    re .15
    
    Tantalum is element #73, right next to Tungsten.  Maybe it's alloyed
    with Aluminum, but I would think you'd want another heavy-ish metal for
    that...
    
    And Titanium might not react with skin much, but it does oxidize...

    My mother also would not let me get my ears pierced. I finally got the
    first set of holes in college.
    From there I have added 6 more on the left and one more on the right. 
    I normally wear one small ring in the upper most hole. Depending on my
    mood I will wear small hoops in all the holes.
    
    To all who are thinking about getting more holes; the further up your
    ear you go, the more pain and more healing time needed.  If I let the
    one up top go for more than a couple of days without an earring it
    starts to close up.
    
    I do love earrings/jewelry and it does depend on my mood as to how many
    and of what type I will wear.
    
    Judy

    Well, I have one pair of ears for which I own one pair of earrings.  1"
    gold hoops.  
    
    Wish I had a buck for every pair I've worn that screwed up my ears. 
    I've given up.
    
    Grins

    Earrings....I love them...about the only jewelry I ever wear.
    
    First holes came when I was 9, the second when I was 15, and the third
    in my left ear when I was in college.  It used to be a big deal to get
    your ears pierced, for the first hole I went to the jewelry store, and
    they took me in a back room and numbed my ears, but for the third hole,
    I went into the store, said, "I want a third hole in my left ear, and
    a diamond stud put in it", and then they let me pick out the earring,
    had me bend over the counter, and BOOM, in it went.  Judy is right 
    about the upper holes being more painful and taking longer to heal,
    mine took about 6 months.  The upper hole closes up real fast too,
    when I went to get my hair permed I had to take out the diamond stud,
    which I promptly lost, and the hole started to close.  I finally got
    this crystal earring in, but it doesn't look nearly as good as the
    diamond.  I've been really lucky that all the holes in my ears are
    centered nicely, and that I haven't had to worry about infections.  If
    a pair of earrings bothers me, I take them out, wait a couple days, and
    the holes are fine again.  My favorite earrings are long, dangly ones,
    whether they be free-form or the South American type with 80 zillion
    pieces of metal hanging from them.  I must have about 50 pairs, but the
    thing I hate the most is that the ones that I've had that have been
    made of real gold, or that were really expensive are ALWAYS the ones
    that fall out of my ears and get lost.  I just don't buy the good ones
    any more.
    
    Lisa

    My daughter asked to have her ears pierced when she was 2.  I told her
    that
    she would have to wait until she was 5 because she would have to care
    for them.  Shortly before her 5th birthday we had them done.  I had
    mine done first so that she would know what to expect.  I had my ears
    pierced for the first time when I was 16 back in the 60's when those
    "hippies" did such things.  I was the first in my school to do it - but
    not the last.  The nuns went wild.  That was there problem.
    
    My daughter turned her earings twice each day as she was told and
    didn't ask to have her first studs changed at all.  She waited for me
    to tell her that she could start changing her earings.  That was part
    of the deal.  Several months before we had ours done, my husband had
    one of his ears pierced - much to the chagrin of the mothers of our
    male adolescent relatives.  I had given him a diamond stud for our
    aniversary. 
    
    I usually wear studs in the top holes and hoops or dangles in the
    bottom.  I sometimes thing about getting another hole - or a tattoo -
    or something.   But if my hairdresser can find a wild enough color for
    my hair that might do the trick - for now.
    
    

    Well, in the catagory of late-starters there's my mother...  To
    celebrate her 80th birthday, she had her ears pierced!  We were all
    thrilled, and excited, and wondering what's next.  
    
    What a way to celebrate eighty!
    
    
    Linda

    Linda-
    
    	God help me, is your mom lightening up some.?????
    
    
    			:-)
    
    Sue

    This is bringing up so many memories for me.  My parents were in the
    "the only girls who pierce their ears are sluts" catagory.  wanted to
    get my ears pierced when I was 15.  My Mom made me wait until I was 16
    and then took me, my best girlfriend and my sister (who was only 14!)
    to a local department store to get our ears pierced.  She didn't tell
    my Dad.  I remember that one of my girlfriend's ears bled and I turned
    green and almost passed out before it was even my turn.  Once it was
    done, though, I was fine.  
    
    Several weeks later Dad woke my sister up and noticed.  "How come you've 
    got little gold balls in your ears?"  he asked.  "They've been there
    for weeks, Dad" she replied.  The next Christmas Dad gave Mom 2 pairs
    of very expensive pierced earrings.  (First present I ever remember him
    buying her.)  Her ears weren't pierced so she had to go out and have
    them done!  (He always was sort of the passive-aggressive type.)
    
    Now I have two holes in my left ear and three in the right.  I usually
    wear diamond studs in the second and third holes and longer earrrings
    in the first.  Sometimes they match, sometimes they don't.  It depends
    on how I feel that day.  I also have a gold earcuff that I wear on
    occassion.  Earrings are another way for me to express the mood of the
    day.  I love them!
    
    Nanci
    

    I got my ears first pierced when I was 12.  A good friend of the
    family did them with a needle and alcohol.  I did the second holes
    myself when I was 14 and I don't remember how old I was when I did the 
    third holes, I just remember not being able to decide between two
    different pairs of earings to put in the top holes, so I said to
    myself, "I'll just put another hole in each ear and wear them both",
    solved that problem.  :-) 
    
    I wear marquis cut saphires in the top holes and solitaire cut diamonds
    in the middle holes (I never take them out except to clean them every
    once in a while).  I change the earings in the bottom holes on a daily
    basis (to match whatever I'm wearing).  Some days I don't wear earings
    in the bottom holes at all (I'm trying to get used to going without 
    because I'm going to have a baby in a couple of weeks and I don't want
    him to pull on them).  I own about 200 pairs (give or take 50) of
    earings and three ear cuffs (that I haven't worn in ages), but I stick
    to a few select pairs.  I don't loose too many earings (I guess I'm
    lucky).  I still have the original pair of earings that I used when I
    got my ears pierced the first time, boy are they ugly :-) , they're
    a solitaire cut ruby surrounded by a daisy of gold, they're 18 years
    old and I'll probably keep them forever (don't ask me why).
    
    I also like earings on men, but some men I think would look funny with
    earings (my boyfriend is one that would look rediculous!).  I've
    pierced quite a few ears of guys that I know and not one has gotten an
    infection.
    
    Lori B.
    I know.  I don't 

    inre .45
    
    Sue, I'm not Linda, but she told me recently that her mom has
    indeed lightened up a lot!
    
    Bonnie
    
    who remembers meeting Linda's mom more than 20 years ago.

    I notice that a number of us had mom's with the attitude that only
    sluts had pierced ears. Does anyone know where that attitude springs
    from? I imagine many of these same moms may have worn clip on earings.
    What's the difference? liesl

    My mother's folks told her that only sluts wore earings, but when
    she started to wear  them in college, her father bought her several
    pairs.
    
    She in turn objected when I got my ears pierced, because she thought
    that pierced ears would strech your ear lobes and look ugly..also
    when she was younger, it *was* only *loose* women who had pierced
    ears..
    
    But only a year or so after I pierced mine she and my two sisters
    had theirs done, and all three of them have a *much* bigger earing
    collection than I do.
    
    I suspect that in certain cultures only 'that sort' of woman pierced
    her ears, and the stigma held over into later generations.
    
    Bonnie

    	My older sister was away at college when I was 16, and to my parents'
    	dismay, she went through a needle/icecube/fainting ritual that made
    	them both sick to their stomachs.

    	However, it got my Mom thinking about pierced ears, and she decided
    	that SHE wanted to have it done professionally herself.  She was
    	nervous about it, though, and she was also worried that I might get
    	ideas about needles and icecubes myself, so she made a deal with me.

    	She agreed to take me with her and to pay for my ears to be pierced
    	if I would agree to go first.  Then, if I didn't scream too loudly,
    	she would go next.  ;^)  (She really said this!!)

    	Needless to say (or "Needle-less" to say,) we both came home that
    	night with little gold studs in pierced ears.  The person used a
    	piercing gun (or whatever) to shoot the studs into our ears.  Piece
    	(or "pierce") of cake!

    	Now, I'm going to end this story before I get nailed for all these
    	terrible puns.  ;^)

       >Now, I'm going to end this story before I get nailed for all these
       >terrible puns.  ;^)
    
Suzanne, 
    You're verrrrry punny.
    
    I never thought of girls being sluts if they got their ears pierced.
    Grandma got her ears pierced at the age of 6 weeks which was common- 
    place for Italians around the turn of the century. (and other Europeans
    as well?)
    
    This very subject gets LOTS of heat in the HELPME::PARENTING. There are
    some people who think that piercing a young child's ears is equivelant
    to circumcision in so far as pain is concerned. Some think it's a form
    of mutilation and disfigurement. Maybe it's because of my Italian up-
    bringing that I feel that it's no big deal.
    
    Kate (Yes, I know the name Kate Donovan does not sound Italian,
          Thanks.)  Oh, that belongs in the "stupid questions" string.
       

    
    Re .49 - why early piercing is "sluttish"....
    
    I got this attitude too. Where I grew up in London it was a class
    thing - jewellery of any kind on girls under 16 (and makeup, at
    that) was seens as "cheap".
    Also, most of the girls who got their ears pierced younger at my
    school were Irish Catholic - which brought in a whole load of other
    prejudices and "group identification" issues to surrounding parents.
    
    It was an area with a horrible attitude, and I'm glad I've left
    it.
    

    The only issue in my case (as with anything within reason I wanted to
    attend/wear-that-was-in-style/enjoy) was that I had to pay for it
    myself.....nobody in my class or my family said anything about being
    slutly....
    
    -Jody

    On the reasoning behind why only 'sluts' have pierced ears..... It is a
    hold-over of very prejudiced thinking, from an era when class
    consciousness was much greater than it is today.  (There were holdovers
    of this thinking in my upbringing.)
    
    In the Victorian era, 'nice' women didn't wear jewelry or makeup.  Only 
    women who were advertising their availability :-) wore it.  [This in an 
    era when many upper-class young women were given the 'grit your teeth 
    and think of England' sexual instruction.]  
    
    Pierced ears were also one of the overt clues to support the prejudice
    against Roman Catholics during the era of their highest immigration. 
    Like most prejudices, it doesn't make a whole lot of logical sense, but
    emotional attitudes can be hard to 'unlearn', and are picked up
    incredibly early.
    
    Alison
    
    

    Victorian women wore jewellry.  Queen Vicky herself always was
    bedecked, often with the jewels her consort, Prince Albert designed and
    had made.  Unfortunately, Albert was no Tiffany or Cartier, his stuff
    was awful! (Victorian women also had (gasp) tattoos.  Yes, the queen
    had one too.  I forget of what and where.)
    
    Back on the subject.
    
    A lot of it is class-consciousness.  Hence my Mom thinking pierced ears
    both slutty and immigrant. But she wore clip ons.  And considerd it
    lady-like to wear earrings when fully dressed. (As well as little white
    gloves!)  Maybe holes meant you could not afford to lose the earring?
    
    I suspect it's simply another us/them distinction. "Us" is always okay
    and "them" is always not quite acceptable. 
     

	I'm getting up the nerve right now to get the fourth piercing
	in my left ear.......up high, in the cartilege, where I want to
	wear a small silver hoop.

	Right now I've got three holes in the left ear and two in the right.

	I got thru phases with what earrings I decide to wear....sometimes
	they're big and flashy, other times their small and nondescript.

	Most of the summer I wear gradually smaller silver hoops in my
	ears (get smaller as they go up the ear) and sometimes I just
	throw on a dangling one or two to go with it.

	A lot of times I hang a beautiful skeleton key from the
	left ear....or a lapis crystal.

	Ear cuffs aren't that hard to find.  Look in any "bizarre"
	jewelry store and you'll see tons of them.  I have three
	or four ear clips, but don't wear them much unless I'm
	out.


	If you go into the Garage in Harvard Square, many of the
	stores there carry anything and everything you could want
	in an ear cuff.


	kath

    re .56, true, it was in style for even "nice" Victorian women to
    have pierced ears.  The Victorian earrings I have are all pierced.
     It's when you get into the vintage jewelry from the 30's, 40's
    and 50's (1900's) that all the earrings are clip-ons.
    
    Lorna
    

    >   ~--e--~  eagles expect most noters don't understand or believe this
    
    understand it, yes.  Believe it exists, yes.  tolerate such in my personal
    life...no.  Not any more.
    
    DougO

I love to adorn myself.  My earrings range from the oh-so-proper diamond or
pearl studs to cascades of silver stars or feathers or beads to platinum 
safety pins to tiny nautilus shells.

All of my ear cuffs are gone now.  One by one I gave them to people who admired
them and now I don't have any left  :-(.  I shall have to mount a search or
maybe make my cousin Jack a cheesecake in exchange for a few ... he does
great work!!  even made a pseudo-tartan with etching on a titanium cuff as a
lark.

My mother asked me if the cuffs meant I was bi-sexual ... she also made several
classist ethnic slurs about the holes in my ears [I have three -- two & one].

I got my ears pierced when I was thirteen and in the hospital with typhoid
fever.  One of the med-techs [actually he was a nurse, but couldn't be an 
officer because he was a man and a nurse ... but I digress] did it for me.
Dad said 'why not?' -- neither one of us knew how Mother felt until after the
deed was done.

  Annie

    
    
    I used to find myself assuming that any man with an earing was gay
    or bi (I know that it was supposed to depend on which side the earing
    was on, but I could never remember which one, and it seemed to vary
    from one part of the country to another).  But now.. so many younger
    men (just out of college and younger) wear a single earing that I think
    it will soon be considered a matter of personal taste -- like long or 
    short hair.  Can't you just see classic diamond studs on display next 
    to the gold cufflinks and tie bars -- with advertisements about
    father's day being just around the corner?
    
    I wear ties and earrings, but usually when I wear a tie, I wear more
    subtle earrings -- don't want to overdo it.
    
    Those of you who have several holes, how do you feel about the
    gold and silver at once problem?  I just got a second hole in one ear,
    and because the stud they put in was surgical steel, I could only let
    myself wear silver for the 8 weeks it took to heal.  My sweetie (who
    had just bought me beautiful gold earrings) seemed to be getting
    impatient to see me wearing them.  Ah, fashion...
    
    Justine
                                 

    RE: .64  mixing gold and silver
                                                          
    Some people may have problems with different metals not working with
    their skin biology. Not sure how it works, but apparently you can get a
    rash from mixing metals.
    
    I cheerfully mix metals and colors.  But then, I somehow wound up part
    gypsey in my attitude toward jewelry.  And I'll wear diamonds and
    rhinestones long before 5:00 pm. rolls around.  
    
      Margaret 
    
         Who today is wearing diamond studs in the top holes
         and dangly non-symmetrical "gold" and crystal
         earrings shaped like flying cupids.  Can you say
         "tacky"?
    

Re: .59 > eagles expect most noters don't understand or believe this

Eagles, Like Doug, I'm not denying that these attitudes exist, understanding
that is the first step in fighting them.


> Would one expect of a senior partner in a law firm that they may have
> earrings ... tattoes ... wear shoes ???

I expect a senior (male) law partner to wear a suit that covers any tattoos, to
not wear earrings to work, and to wear shoes... but I'm fighting this attitude
in myself since it is silly and superficial and I resent it when others apply it
to me. By the way, I would expect a senior (female) partner in a law firm to
wear discreet earrings, and I'm fighting that attitude too.

> but sometimes one just does not get a promotion or a choice assignment or
> rent a desirable apartment and wonders _why_

I used to spend a LOT of energy in wondering what other people thought of me,
and I never knew. Now I spend very little time worrying about it, and I'm sure.
Go figure. If I ever lose a promotion because of the way I look, I will talk to
my manager about it. If I don't get satisfaction I will work somewhere else. Not
everyone has that luxury. Since I do, I use my position to try to stretch
people attitudes. Besides, its fun.

> Try this mental experiment ... if a woman wears a corset to achieve
> a very tiny waist under her very close-fitted working costumes ... is
> she a slut, an entertainer ... or a lawyer ?  Now imagine a man wearing
> a similar corset ... does he have a back injury, is he a weight-lifter
> ... or Vice President of the Bank of Boston ?

The only man I know who ever wore corsets like that at all *was* a banker and
did indeed wear them to work. That has helped *me* avoid such generalizations.

I used to live afraid of what other people thought of me. Now I hang out with
people that like me when I'm acting the way *I* like. It's much nicer.

	-- Charles

	RE: men, earrings, and which side means what....


	The saying goes "left is right and right is wrong"


	Of course, it's a stupid saying because everyone knows being
	gay or bi is not "wrong".....


	As far as I heard, the same holds true for multiple holes
	in women's ears and the balance there-of.....

	But I really don't think anyone listens to that anymore (at
	least I hope not).

	My housemate's got a small diamond in his left ear and it
	looks SCRUMPTIOUS!  :-)

		kath

I mix metals and colors all the time...but then, I have never been 
known for my fashion sense.  :-)

I 14 year old son of a friend of the family has an ear piercing in which
he keeps a stud with a small yin-yang symbol.  He looks absolutely great
in it - I was very surprised, but please, that his mother let him do it.
(She is kind of conservative.)

D!

    	I think mixing metals was more "taboo" years ago then it is
    now.  I know my mom always commented negatively to me when I did
    it and now she does it often.  I don't really pay all that much
    attention to it - in fact, I have a pair of earrings that are
    silver hoops with gold balls on them.

    	My rule is - if it looks good, go with it! :^)

    	amy

    Thank you, Charles.  You said what I meant.
    
    DougO

	Speaking of ear cuffs (was it in this note?)

	Anyway, Amy and I trekked to Harvard sq this weekend and found
	the most beautiful cuffs everywhere!  I picked up a person (looks
	like the guy is climbing up my ear) and she picked up a rose....

	There were LOTS of different styles at many of the stores......

	kathy

kathy, can you name names please?
	Mez

>kathy, can you name names please?

	Gads!  I never know the names of places that I shop.  I think
	the best bet would be to go into the stores upstairs in the
	Garage (Harvard Sq).   That's where we found what we were looking
	for.

	There was also that store in Porter Sq that had some (help me
	Amy, i'm floundering!)

	kath

    	Umm..I'm not sure I'm gonna be much more help!  We went into
    so many different places! :^)  Kath's right - definitely check out 
    the two jewelry places in the Garage (can't miss those)...there was
    another place across the street and down a bit from Arsenic and Old 
    Lace on Mass Ave...  Or just do what we did - take a beautiful afternoon 
    and go wandering! :^)


    	(As an aside, I read Mez's request in a rather funny way the
    first time.  Kath said she "picked up a person" and Mez asked her
    to name names! :^) )


    	amy

    RE: .74
    
	>another place across the street and down a bit from Arsenic and Old 
	>Lace on Mass Ave... 
    
    Do you mean Susannah's?  
    
    They have AMAZING jewellry there.
    
    Also recommend the NH state crafts fair, every year in early August. 
    Anyone up in NH have details?  Last year was awesome (and expensive!!)
    
       Margaret

>    Do you mean Susannah's?  
    
    	Hmm...that name doesn't ring a bell, but that doesn't mean
    much.  I wasn't really paying much attention to store names.

    	amy

    Did anybody catch the piece on "piercing" on All Things Considered
    last night?
    
    Apparently, there is a place in San Francisco that will pierce just
    about any part of the body that can be pierced:
    
    Shop owner: "Let's see, we had 86 nipples in March...that was a
    big nipple month.  Ten upper lips, 2 long pauls..."
    
    Announcer: "Never you mind what a long paul is...you don't want
    to know."
    
    goes beyond the simple diamond studs, eh?
    
    daniel

    daniel
    
    I heard that too, and was cringing just a little bit!
    
    Bonnie

    *cringing*?  I was just trying to keep from imagining what parts
    they were really talking about! :-0
    
    I must admit, though, that the tongue jewelry band had me in severe
    giggle fits!
    
    I dunno...people have suggested to me that I'd look good with an
    earring, but I just can't bring myself to do it.  My body came with
    a fixed number of punctures...when I get another one, I usually
    but a band aid over it...
    
    *sigh* poor old repressed me, :-)
    
    daniel

    yes, the tongue jewlry band was funny..
    
    bj

    Then there's that creature on the MTV video with her nose chained 
    to her ear...

    Re: -1 "her nose chained to her ear..."
    
    I used to do that when I was ahum, quite a bit younger!!  I was invited
    to a friend's Indian wedding, and it's a tradition that the bride wears
    a lovely decorated chain from her nose to her ear, it looked really
    pretty when she had all the other traditional jewellery on, but Western
    styles and dress certainly makes it look...  differrent!!
    
    
    Chris   :-)
    
    PS:  My Mum used to ask if I thought either my nose or my ear were
    going to run away!!  tee hee!
    

I assume the place being referred to was The Gauntlet?  (I, unfortunatly,
didn't catch the NPR show but I'll bet it wouldn't have taught me anything
about the subject I don't already know.)

Besides, we've already covered *other* body parts being pierced in this
version, what, a couple weeks ago?  :-)

D!

>	I believe a male member of Skid Row has the same arrangement.

	Yup...humina, humina....



	Frankly, I think it looks good on Jane Child.  She's beautiful
	in an odd sort of way.


	My mother always jokes that I would come home with a pierced
	nose next.....  I'm sure it doesn't hurt, but wouldn't it be
	awful when you get a cold or something?  Besides, everywhere you
	go, everyone's got their noses done at least once.  I'm not
	one to go much for fashion.....at least not that much.

	k

    
    I think Jane Child would probably be very attractive... if she
    got rid of the chain and changed her hair style...   either way
    her 1st hit song on MTV was very good...  second one "Welcome
    to the Real World Part 2"  not so good.

    
    i have one earring in, and have had several friends try to talk me
    into a few more piercings.  they haven't succeeded yet, but i am
    wavering.  (especially after watching a friend do four up one ear
    in one sitting)
    
    i wanted to get one in college, but it seemed too trendy at the time.
    now earrings seem to be going out of fashion for guys, so i got my
    first one last winter.
    
    umm........haven't gotten too many comments on it.....negative or
    positive, but reading this conference makes me feel better about
    the one that i have so far, and also gives me a little push for more...
    
    jonathan
    

    
>    umm........haven't gotten too many comments on it.....negative or
>    positive, but reading this conference makes me feel better about
>    the one that i have so far, and also gives me a little push for more...

    Jonathan, your earrings fit you and your image.  They look GREAT
    on you (especially when they're MY earrings you're wearing! :-) )

    Get another one if it's what you want (but don't let others
    pressure you into it).  A guy with multiple small silver hoops....Waa!
    I love it....


	kath