| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 236.1 | more headlines... | IOSG::DAVEY | | Mon Sep 08 1986 17:37 | 24 |
| I have a number of headlines, which I must admit are culled straight
from a book I have...
a wartime one...
ALLIES PUSH BOTTLES UP GERMANS
one more recent, from a Wilson govt. Cabinet reshuffle...
WILSON TAKES OUT HIS CHOPPER
and
SQUAD HELPS DOG
BITE VICTIM
DEAD EXPECTED TO RISE
MAN EATING PIRANHA MISTAKENLY SOLD AS PET FISH
COLUMNIST GETS UROLOGIST IN TROUBLE WITH HIS PEERS
John
|
| 236.2 | On purpose..... | DAMSEL::MOHN | | Tue Sep 09 1986 11:24 | 9 |
| While the "fractured" headlines in .1 were probably inadvertent,
the headline in .0 was written on purpose (advertent?). What I
was trying to get at was purposeful puns in headlines, not dangling
participles or mis-placed modifiers, et al. I suspect that they
would have to be somewhat obscure in order to get by the various
editors (or to tickle the editors' sense of play enough to have
them ignore the blue pencil). Just wondering....
Bill
|
| 236.3 | | BEING::POSTPISCHIL | Always mount a scratch monkey. | Fri Sep 12 1986 22:06 | 5 |
| When a number of people were killed in a McDonald's restaurant,
I thought one of Rupert Murdock's papers might use "McMassacre".
-- edp
|
| 236.4 | here's one | MODEL::YARBROUGH | | Mon Sep 15 1986 09:56 | 3 |
| VARIETY is famous for convoluted and pun-filled headlines:
"STIX NIX HIX PIX" is a famous example (suburbanites don't go to
movies about country yokels.)
|
| 236.5 | Vertant Headlines | DRAGON::MCVAY | Pete McVay, VRO (Telecomm) | Tue Sep 16 1986 15:01 | 12 |
|
There was a rumor that Ho Chi Minh was being outsted as North
Vietnam's leader, and some paper in New York ran the headline
REPORT HEAVE GIVEN HO
Not exactly a headline, but Senators Long (Louisiana), Wong
(Hawaii), and Spong (California) once got together to sponsor
a bill prohibiting the importing of sheet music from Hong Kong,
because the Hong Kong government did not comply with international
copyright conventions. The bill was known as the "Long, Wong,
Spong Hong Kong Song" bill.
|
| 236.6 | Dodd Dam??? | APTECH::RSTONE | | Wed Sep 17 1986 16:06 | 3 |
| I once heard that they wanted to name a new power dam after Senator
Dodd, but decided against it. :^)
|
| 236.7 | leave it to beaver | GWEN::OSMAN | and silos to fill before I feep, and silos to fill before I feep | Thu Sep 18 1986 14:48 | 7 |
| Just yesterday, in the aftermath (pun seed on THAT word eh?) of a flood
after rains somewhere out west, the news was discussing a dam at which
an inspector was making the rounds.
They kept referring to him as the "dam inspector" !
/Eric
|
| 236.8 | | DRAGON::MCVAY | Pete McVay, VRO (Telecomm) | Thu Sep 18 1986 21:15 | 6 |
| "The Old Milright Dam, variously known as the Huston County
Dam, Beaver Creek Dam, and Old Creek Dam, was given an official
name yesterday in the Town Council Meeting. From now on, it
will be known as the 'Old Milright Bamm'."
-- from "Press Boners", by Earle Temple
|
| 236.9 | The bid was rejected.... | FDCV01::BEAIRSTO | | Mon Sep 29 1986 08:59 | 5 |
| When Textron tried to buy out a small Rhode Island company that
produces the things you use instead of nails, a local editor who
didn't think much of the bid ran this headline:
TEXTRON MAKES OFFER TO SCREW COMPANY SHAREHOLDERS
|
| 236.10 | Pundit | FRSBEE::COHEN | Bowling for Towels | Tue Sep 30 1986 09:03 | 8 |
| War dims hope for peace -- Wisconsin State Journal 12/27/65
Lucky man sees pals die -- The New American 4/4/78
Stiff opposition expected to casketless funeral plan -- Toronto Star 4/7/74
Silent teamster gets cruel punishishment: Lawyer -- Home News 12/15/75
|
| 236.11 | One from a college paper sports section | VIDEO::KOVNER | Everything you know is wrong! | Tue Feb 09 1988 22:37 | 15 |
| Here's one from the sports section of my college newspaper.
The staff must have waited years for this opportunity.
If you are easily offended, or don't want to bother seeing sophomoric
puns, skip this note!
When one of our teams beat Bates College, the headline read...
ENGINEERS MASTER BATES
Well, I warned you.
|
| 236.12 | This one made the *Columbia Jounalism Review* | SKIVT::ROGERS | Lasciate ogni speranza, voi ch'entrate | Wed Feb 10 1988 15:47 | 11 |
| I thought I'd put this one in earlier, but I guess I didn't...
Several winters ago during Winter Carnival in Middlebury, Vt. One of the frat
houses produced a heroic-sized female nude snow sculpture. Wouldn't have been
too bad but they colored it using RIT clothes die in a lifelike pink. The
*Addison Independent* reported:
OBSCENE SCULPTURE AROUSES RESIDENTS
Larry
|
| 236.13 | old pun | STUBBI::B_REINKE | where the sidewalk ends | Thu Feb 11 1988 04:04 | 5 |
| in re .11
They copied that from Charles Dickens... M. Bates was a charater
in Oliver Twist....
|
| 236.14 | | BOLT::MINOW | Je suis marxiste, tendance Groucho | Sun Feb 14 1988 18:13 | 4 |
| A local radio newscaster -- on public broadcasting, no less -- once
previewed a basketball game between the Boston and Chicago teams as
"Celtics pitted against Bulls."
|
| 236.15 | upset ? 'sno wonder! | LAMHRA::WHORLOW | Progress:=!(going_backwards>coping) | Mon Feb 15 1988 01:07 | 11 |
| G'day,
There was I understand a Uni where the students made a giant statue,
in snow, of the female form. They then accentuated things by colouring
it pink. This was too much for the Mayor who felt they had gone
too far. The newspaper headline read
'Giant female form arouses city father' (or somesuch)
Derek
|
| 236.16 | | HYDRA::PARSONS2 | Lets be nice to him | Wed Jan 04 1989 00:34 | 11 |
|
Saw this today (1/3/89) in The Lowell Sun
Cheerleaders not in finals-
The Lowell High School cheerleaders competed in their
first nationwide competition last week in Dallas, returning home
with newfound friends and new experiences under their belt....
|
| 236.17 | | MYCRFT::PARODI | John H. Parodi | Thu May 14 1992 04:58 | 9 |
|
Yesterday's Nashua Telegraph had this headline:
Aldermen Back Home For Girls
So, where have they been? And was this the only way to get them back?
JP
|
| 236.18 | | AUSSIE::WHORLOW | Bushies do it for FREE! | Thu May 14 1992 15:56 | 10 |
| G'day,
Reminds me of the headline...
Help our Nurses Home.....
dj
|