Conference quark::mennotes-v1

    Spence, how short is your kilt?
    
    --bonnie

    <blush>
    Actually, I don't have one.  I once found a shop in Germany that
    had them but they were so expensive that I couldn't afford one.
    Well, really, the kilt wasn't so expensive, but with all of the
    stuff to make it complete, I couldn't justify the expense.  I wish
    now that I had gotten it because I can't find them in Colorado.
    At that time, the dollar was at an all time low.  Besides, I couldn't
    decide between the 'Fraser hunting' and the 'Fraser dress' tartans
    and I certainly couldn't afford both.                           
          
    Although I am of Scottish ancestry, I am a full blooded American.
    Knowing that I would be living in a country where a kilt would be
    looked upon in an unfavorable manner and I wouldn't get a lot of use
    out of it, I couldn't justify paying $100+ for one.     
                                                            
    I also wanted a bagpipe, but the one I wanted was $600+.
             
    One day, I plan to go to Scotland and get a kilt and a bagpipe.
    I already have a tour guide set up (Trapper John, fur those o ye
    wha ken Trap) but no date.  
    
    Anybody know of somewhere in (preferably) Colorado that sells kilts
    and 'pipes?  Now that I'm rich and famous.  I'd have Trapper send
    me one, but I don't know what size I'd wear (European<>American).
    I wear a size 30 American if anyone wants to convert it for me,
    Ian maybe.  If I could get ahold of the material (Fraser) then I
    could make my own.  I don't think I could wear it to work though.
    Especially for crawling around under disk drives. ;-)
    
    I hope this wasn't too big of a let down.  My previous mention of
    it was sort of 'tongue-in-cheek' and I was thinking about the one
    that I *almost* bought.  I'm surprised that anyone remembered.
                          
    Spence            

    Once upon a time, there was a scottish lad named Mac Intyre who went to
    his tailor to have a kilt made. He asked the tailor for Mac Intyre
    Tartan. But when the tailor showed him the material, he said :
    "That's not Mac Intyre tartan, that's Dunlop Tartan"
    to which the tailor replied :
    
    "Come on, lad, everyone knows that Dunlop have been Mac Intyres
    for years...."
    

    Here in Colorado, at Cheyenne Mountain High School, where the school
    is located on a mountainous mesa, very close to the sun in the summer
    time, the males made news doing the same thing.  The Superintendant
    threatened expulsion if the form of protest did not cease, the males
    weren't intimidated, the females liked the male leg show, the
    Superintendant gave in, the males won, then school was out for the
    summer.
    
    Sherman

< Note 111.2 by TRACER::FRASHER "Undercover mountain man" >

�    Well, really, the kilt wasn't so expensive, but with all of the
�    stuff to make it complete, 

     That reminds me...
     
     As you are all no doubt aware, when a Scotsman is dressed formally
     he wears a sporran with his plaid ("kilt") as well as an intimidating 
     looking dirk (a very sharp knife) on his belt and a scean dubh (spelling?)
     which is a very sharp knife worn tucked into the sock. This is a tradition
     dating back to the middle ages when nobody went unarmed, but when you
     entered somebody's house you gave up your sword anr dirk. Most people
     were untrusting enough to carry a concealed weapon "just in case" and
     the tradition grew of wearing the scean dubh as a "visible concealed"
     weapon - the host knew about it, and it wasn't intimidating.
     
     Anyway a few years back I was flying from Aberdeen to Edinburgh when
     a gentleman in front of me in Highland Dress went through the metal
     detector and it went wild. The guards took a few minutes before they
     realised that the dirk and scean dubh caused the problem (you often
     don't see things that are totally familiar). They then asked him to
     surrender his "weapons". He was highly indignant: they aren't weapons
     they are part of his formal dress. After about fifteen minutes they
     (having been joined by somebody more senior) agreed to compromise:
     they let him fly wearing the dirk and scean dubh... and he didn't even
     try to hijack the plane :-)
             
     Second anecdote: I was in a bar in Aberdeen trying hard to ignore a 
     couple of English Soccer fans who were noisily getting drunk. A Scot
     in highland dress came to the bar to get a drink, and one of the soccer
     fans asked him "what do y' wear under the skirt, girlie?" 
     
     ... This was a mistake! about two seconds later the scot had the fan
     trapped against the bar with the point of his dirk under the fan's chin.
     The fan didn't look very drunk after that, but he did look rather ill :-)
             
     /. Ian .\

    I went through the same thing at the parocial high school I attended.
    Initially it was an all girls school and in the winter we were allowed
    to wear certain color dress pants.  Then the school merge with a
    co-ed parocial school with a new headmaster and differant set of
    rules.  This headmaster forbid the girls to wear pants during the
    winter,  even though many of us had to transfer buses 2 and 3 times
    in the middle of winter. We were told we had to wear our black plaid
    skirts and blouses and the boys suit coat tie and jacket, no questions 
    asked.  Well, about 7 of my friends and I decided we did not feel
    this rule was appropriate for winter.  So one day we all planned
    to wear pants, suitcoats and ties.  When we arrived at school we were 
    told if we did not change into our skirts we were all expelled for the 
    day, well we all left.   And the next year they allowed girls to wear 
    pants during the winter!
                 
    

    When I bought my kilt in Edinburgh, it cost me 7 Pounds, or about $21.
    Obviously from the price and the exchange rate, this was a very long
    time ago.  As it happens, there's some MacIntyre on my mother's side
    and that's the tartan that I wanted.  When one shopkeeper proferred
    some wares of an obviously different hue, I protested that it did not
    look like the MacIntyre that I'd seen in another shop.  His explanation
    that these were the "old" colors made me suspicious.  How traditional
    could it be, I said, if they came out with a new version periodically.
    My host dragged me out of that shop before I made an even bigger fool
    of myself and patiently explained the difference between "dress",
    "hunting", and "ancient" as tartan adjectives. 
    

    Unfortunately, I have been unable to maintain my waistline to the
    original measurements and the kilt is turning into a McDonald's for
    moths.  Maybe my son will grow into it.  There's many a hot summer
    night I wish I had a lightweight denim kilt I could wear around the
    house.  I wonder if 'The Colonel' knows of such a thing as army surplus
    Highland Regiment tropical kit that would be suitable. 
    
    My understanding of the skhean dbuh was that in battle you knocked your
    opponent down with the claymore and then kneeling over their prostrate
    form you quickly drew the blade from your stocking top and slit their
    throat with it.  It would also be effective coming up from a kneeling
    position to plunge upward below the rib cage.
     

    Ah well...
    
    I have heard several explanations of the origin of the knives work by
    Scotsmen: that suggested by Dennis is as lkely as any other. Many ancient
    tribesmen carried more than one knife and a small "back up" blade to
    despatch the fallen is not uncommon either. The tale as I related it
    however might explain how a battle weapon came to be an accepted part
    of formal evening attire.
    
    As for summer plaids: the mind boggles (especially for the traditional
    plaid, rather than the modern "skirt style" garment (no offense intended
    to my Scottish friends and kin)).
                                    
    As for girls wanting to wear slacks because they had to change busses:
    how nesh can you get? H**l until I was 13 school rules required that
    boys wore grey flannel shorts, and black blazer (though a gabardine
    raincoat was allowed, the wind still managed to chill you down). And
    yes I had a 7 mile bus ride and a 1� mile walk to get to school, with
    a usual wait of 20-30 minutes for a bus. I frequently wished they'd
    let us wear long socks like the girls :-) Anyway what does it matter
    how long it took to stand waiting for busses: when we got to school
    we had to stay in the yard until they let us in (and that included a
    minimum of 15 minutes standing at attention for roll call). If it was
    a typical rainy, windy winter day, by the time you got in you were wet
    to the skin, raincoat and all. It usually took till nearly lunch time
    to get dry (always assuming the heating was working - and you didn't
    have to go out in the rain to visit the toilets)! You'd just about feel 
    comfortable when 4 o'clock would stagger round again and you'd be faced 
    with an hour and a half to 2 hours to crawl back home, arriving looking 
    for all the world like a drowned rat. At least on the homeward leg you 
    had a cup of hot Bovril and a steaming hot bath to look forward to.   
    
    /. Ian .\
    
    
    

What is that? Is it the strains of 'The Four Yorkshiremen' from 'Monty Python 
Live'....?

Tarik.

(Sorry Ian, couldn't resist...:-))

    When I was in school, one of the men would usually wear a skirt
    when we were all hanging around the dorm.  He said it was a lot more
    comfortable.  He was one of the more hetero- men in the dorm, and
    his skirt didn't seem to entice or repel anyone...
    
    At NEFFA [contra/folk dancing festival] I ran into another man in
    a skirt.  Not only was it more comfortable (less hot) but it is
    much more fun to twirl in a skirt than in pants.
    
    I guess you don't have to be scottish...
    
    Lee

>    I guess you don't have to be scottish...
    
 	Or Arabic, or Greek or Turkish or Indian or Roman or .....

Richard.

�>    I guess you don't have to be scottish...
� 	Or Arabic, or Greek or Turkish or Indian or Roman or .....

      I think you could safely say that in Europe, Africa or Asia men wearing
      a wrap around garment would not cause more than a slight turn of the
      head if that amongst on lookers.
      
      In down town Boston however...
      
      /. Ian .\
      
      [ only joking, I think ]