| T.R | Title | User | Personal
Name | Date | Lines |
|---|
| 36.1 | Making what seems to be the right choice | CSC32::C_BESSANT | | Wed Nov 26 1986 11:40 | 42 |
|
What was right yesterday may not be right for you tomorrow, next
week, next month or next year. New insights and feelings may
surface that were unknown or buried previously.
I don't think it is wrong to be in this type of situation. What
is wrong is to be in this situation and not do what is right when
the time is right. To hang on for the sake of hanging on is not
the answer. The answer seems to be to do what is right at the time
and not beat yourself for what seems to be a poor decision in the
past. Get on with the present and remember the past so similar
situations do not reoccur.
Even being in love at one time can dissolve into dissolution later
on. Everyone has 2 choices and the best choice is usually taken
based on information at hand. Kind of like at the horse track. you
pick 3 to win and it winds up placing. Based on what you had to
go on, you made a choice. Later on the results are final and either
you made a good choice or you made not so good choice, but you made
it on given information.
There is never any guarentees except taxes and death. The first
one you can sometimes work around, but the second one is going to
happen. Just like marrying someone or living with someone, it may
work out or it may not. Either way you had a choice and at the time
you pick what appears to be the best one, especially one as serious
as living with someone (not just a roommate) or marrying someone.
Wouldn't it be great if we had a crystal ball we could look
into and see what the future holds for us so we can make the right
choices. ANybody know of one??? If so, let me know. I make choices
based on information at hand and I make what I feel is the best
decision at the time. Later on that may not be true, but if I really
believe what I am doing is correct then I can not blame myself for
making a bad decision.
This got a lot longer than I planned and I may have rambled
on too long. Hope you got what my impression is on this NOTE, it
is a real situation that happens to a lot of people and they sometimes
beat themselves for making a mistake later on.
Chuck
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| 36.2 | That's Life | APEHUB::STHILAIRE | | Wed Nov 26 1986 14:51 | 8 |
|
This reminds me of a line from an Edna St.Vincent Millay poem, "Need
we say it was not love just because it perished".
I agree pretty much with what .1 has to say.
Lorna
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| 36.3 | Tomorrow may not come | PERCH::SCOTT | | Thu Nov 27 1986 23:44 | 6 |
| If it feels good, do it, because you may not get the chance again.
We can't spend our lives holding back, worrying about what the
future *might* bring. Keep one eye on tomorrow but live for today.
Roland
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| 36.4 | live for today ;-) | VORTEX::JOVAN | the closer i get to you... | Fri Nov 28 1986 00:00 | 4 |
| I heard once...
that if you keep one foot in the past and the other in the future
you're p*ssing all over today!
|
| 36.5 | too many reasons why | KALKIN::BUTENHOF | Approachable Systems | Tue Dec 02 1986 09:29 | 22 |
| People change and grow all the time. If you pick a partner
who doesn't change and grow at the same rate, and in the
same direction, as you, you'll slowly but steadily lose your
compatibility.
That's primarily why teen marriages generally don't last...
teens are still growing rapidly, even though they might not
realize it. Adults usually change much less, and much less
rapidly; but they *do* change. People living together who
care about each other will usually tend to adjust to the
other, and become *more* compatible... but it doesn't always
work that way.
People *can* also start out with misconceptions and
rationalizations, but there are probably too many possible
forms and reasons to discuss generally. Additionally, you
can't really ever know *everything* about someone... and
generally you know fairly little before making a real
commitment; you may learn something later which changes your
perception towards the other.
/dave
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| 36.6 | worst case | CGHUB::CONNELLY | Eye Dr3 - Regnad Kcin | Sat Dec 06 1986 20:17 | 13 |
|
There are a couple of things that can make you think you're more compatible
with each other than you are:
o neither person has stopped to think about what s/he is looking for
beforehand, so the choice is between "this relationship or nothing"
o "blazing hormones": things are too driven by sex, so all the other
important considerations get crowded out
o one or both persons is lying/dissembling/covering-up to appear more
desirable as a mate
These have a more immediate impact than "growing apart", since you probably
won't make it beyond the infatuation stage at all.
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| 36.7 | Love is quick. | AKOV04::WILLIAMS | | Mon Dec 22 1986 15:57 | 8 |
| It is the nature of rope to tangle. In order to learn it you must
fathom the tangles.
Love is as fleeting as a Spring day. Friendship and compassion
last. Most people fall in and out of love a hundred times in their
lives with a hundred different people but develop very few friends.
Enjoy the love and work on the friendship. Tomorrow will yake care
of itself, if you work hard enough.
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