Conference quark::human_relations-v1

    
    This is very interesting.  You say that each time something was
    taken, your car or your apartment was broken into, burglary style?
    If so, then this is not a usual symptom of kleptomania.  (But that
    does not make her any less "sick" if she is the culprit.)  Breaking
    in, burglarizing, is a serious crime.
    
    Talk to this woman.  Tell her that you have good reason to believe
    that someone you know has been taking things from you and other
    people.  Don't accuse her outright (law suits tend to breed) but
    tell her that you must go to the police unless your belongings are
    returned.  Do not ask her - tell her that if she knows  anything
    about it, that no questions will be asked and no legal action will
    be taken if the property is returned within, say, a week.
    
    If you do not get your belongings back, file a police report and
    urge other victims to do likewise.  Don't sit back and be a complacent
    victim.
    
    Regardless of what happens, invest in some serious burglar-proofing.
    Inform your landlord of what is going on.  Have him install dead-bolts
    and chain locks.  Put rods in your window-tracks.  And keep an eye
    on this woman if you ever let her in your apartment again.

    That would be my approach.  Hope this helps.
    
    Carol
    

    
    I would send a form letter to all of the tenants in the area/building
    stating that minor burglaries have been taking place and that the
    police have been notified also. I would also list what was taken.
    This will serve to warn others and also indirectly let the guilty
    party know that that persons' thefts have not gone unnoticed.
    Don't expect anything back though. And be careful singling someone
    out.
    		Good luck

    Though this may be straying from the subject a bit, don't use
    your social security number as an id - police departments can't
    trace that.  Use your drivers license number, with state abbreviation,
    instead.  (Of course, some states use SSNs as drivers license
    numbers...)
    
    However, I can't see this as a satisfactory approach to dealing
    with nonsense thefts like these - this is a sickness, and no
    amount of IDs is going to stop someone from taking these things.
    We get some amount of petty theft in our offices too - things that
    would seem of minimal value to anyone.
    
    				Steve

    I would recommend against confronting the person unless you have pretty
    good reasons to believe that this person is the culprit -- for me, that
    would about have to be catching the person wearing one of the missing
    outfits. 
    
    Why? What if you're wrong? I know *I'd* be really embarrassed if I
    accused someone unjustly.
    
    	Jon 

    If you have ever been falsely accused of something, you may remember
    how unpleasant it was--there is essentially no way to prove a
    negative, and plain denial sounds thin.  Further, if you see a person
    thinks you are bad enough to do X, then it's clear they think you
    are capable of denying your guilt as well, so denial gains you
    nothing.
    
    I can still remember the time my parents thought I had broken a cellar
    window (back when I was ten or so).  I hadn't, and told them so--they
    did not believe me.  How could I prove I hadn't?  I got agitated
    and angry, which made them all the more sure I was lying.   I wound
    up paying for its repair out of my allowance.  This was a source
    of resentment for some time...
    
    Accusations tend to stick, too--I guess you all don't think I'd
    still lie about breaking a cellar window, but what if I told you
    I had been falsely accused of a "real" crime in the recent past
    (not the case, I'm happy to say)?  How many of you would wonder
    whether I was telling the truth, or whether there was some truth
    to the accusation?
    
    So be careful.  Stating facts ("My foobar has been taken") and
    intentions ("I'm going to report it to the police") is ok.
    Confrontation ("I think you did it") is maybe not a good idea.
    
    				-John Bishop

I wish to reiterate two points raised by other responders:

Breaking in is not part of the Kleptomaniac's MO.

You could be getting set up for a major rip-off.

It could be possible that the person you suspect of kleptomania is guilty 
of having taken some of the small items you are now missing (but I would be 
very, very careful about making undocumented accusations, for reasons 
already cited).  That does not mean that the person who took those items
and the person who broke in are one and the same (do you really know when 
the missing mascarra disappeared?).

something very similar happened to me years ago.  My appartment was broken into,
with nothing of value taken, just some rather obscure objects.  We sealed up 
the house, replacing locks, and felt we solved the problem - Wrong.  We forgot 
to secure the Transent above the appartment door.  Two weeks later, that 
transent was pushed in and every item of value we had was gone.

A common action by small-time thieves is to break in and see what is available.
They then plan what they need to do to take that, and often, presell the 
items (less likelyhood of being caught with the goods if you have them for 
only as much time as it takes to deliver them to a buyer).

So, try to find concrete evidence of the Klepto's guilt before any confrontation
(it could be she had bought the same perfume as the person was missing), AND
take precautions against further visits by unwelcome guests.

Joe

What an ugly problem.  I thought this was a pretty useful suggestion:

< Note 384.2 by VIKING::MODICA >
>    I would send a form letter to all of the tenants in the area/building
>    stating that minor burglaries have been taking place and that the
>    police have been notified also. I would also list what was taken.

In addition, on the form letter, say that you have installed a burglar 
alarm in your apartment and would people please call you at work if it goes 
off.  This sometimes scares thieves off, whether or not the alarm is there.

By the way, Radio Shack has burglar alarms, for less than $100, that 
respond to motion.  Good devices for an apartment without pets or drapes 
that swish in heater currents.       Good luck,     Meigs