Conference noted::equitation

    Oh Ann, a sad story that I too have seen (not to such degree) too
    often.  I have been showing all my life and fortunately had a "horsey"
    mother that understood the show world and never ever pushed me to
    win but to always have fun.  I always remember seeing my mom on
    the rail - and everytime I would pass by she would say "smile, have
    fun, you look great!"...those words do so much more for a kid then
    "sit up, look ahead, use your legs" etc...
    
    I only feel bad for the little kid, certainly not the mom, the poor
    kid will soon learn to resent riding and always associate showing
    with a no-fun, all work attitude, and that the sole purpose is to
    come home with ribbons.
    
    I really have nothing else to say except that you and the paramedics
    reacted very well, we can only hope that the mother will learn from
    this experience...but who knows...
    
     - jenny -  
                                                            

    Some parents have to "achieve" through their children. These kind
    of stories crop up in every sport in which kids participate. "Little
    League Parents" is the term I have heard most often, which may be
    unfairly criticising Little League. Both mothers and fathers are
    guilty of this behaviour, which fortunately is not too common. Their
    behaviour practically guarentees that their kids will have nothing
    to do with the sports into which they have been pushed when they
    become independent.
    
    I don't know why parents do it. I leave the explanation to those
    in the mental health field.
    

    THANK YOU!!!!!!  For telling that child not to MOVE anything!  All
    to often after a fall like that someone will try to get up.....if
    it was a cervical spine injury and she moved she would of been
    paralyzed for life.......
    
    As for the mother.....she has problems.   No one should let a child
    ride an animal that scares her/him.  Riding is for fun.  As a parent
    I can't understand that woman at all.  My child comes first and
    after a fall like that girl took she should have been worried about
    her.....not the competition.
    
    But again, your quick thinking did wonders! 
    
    bs

    
    RE: 0
    
    The incident that you describe sadly is not that uncommon in any
    type of competition that children are involved in.  The 'Little
    League' parent exists no matter what the sport is.
    
    Those of us that have any responsiblity for shows that children
    participate in need to be aware of this and not hesitate to give
    these competitors the gate or refuse them the gate.  You will not
    make friends this way but at least will insure the saftey of all
    concerned.
    
    Here in Colorado the putting kids on a 'over-horsepowered' horse
    is unusual in the horse shows, but is frequently seen in the speed
    events(barrels, poles, etc).  It reached the point where the rules
    of some of the riding clubs were changed so that the competitor
    had to enter and leave the arena at a walk.
    
    Back to your incident, it sounds like the mother involved was fairly
    new to horsey shows.  I think that we all need to take this type
    and convince them of the saftey required.

    To sum this up and get off my soap box.  I've seen a lot of talented
    kids get so burned out by this that they just quit.  So I hope that
    if sombody notices me being a 'little league' parent they will tell
    me.
    
    -John-
    

    
    
    This also sounds like a typical case of 10% of information being
    worse than 0% information.  She (the mother) must have just picked
    up some "horse talk" from hanging around the barn and watching the
    daughters lessons - and then considered herself an expert (or at
    least extremely knowledgable).  I second (or is it third??) the
    comments above in regards to the "little league parents".  There
    are usually two kinds, both of which can be obnoxious. 1) the kind
    that is 100% behind the kid, who sits in the stands and yells at
    the other team and the ump's or the other parents.  They don't mean
    harm, and want the kid to have fun, but they don't realize how what
    they say affects the kids actually playing the game.  Especially
    if they are yelling instructions to their kid.  The poor kid can
    get so confused and frustrated that they don't ever want to play
    again.  2) the kind that wants their kids to win no matter what
    happens.  This kind was described in  an earlier reply.
    
    Unfortunately, most parents don't have the time to spend to learn
    how to ride - and probably don't have the least bit of interest
    in doing so.  Showmanship?? Well,  I would think that any reasonable
    person could pick up the basics by paying attention to other
    competitors at show that she/he attended.  
    
    Don't the judges have the right to tell someone who is disturbing
    the class (someone outside of the ring) to keep it down??  Or to
    leave the area??
    
    

    Ever since I got my horse and started showing, my parents would
    attend a few shows to take pictures and see what it was all about,
    but they (thank goodness!) didn't know enough about the sport to
    'coach' or pressure me.  
    
    Many shows I attended had entire Show Families.  Not only was the
    mother on the rail yelling at the kid, but the father, sisters,
    brothers and even the instructor or trainer.  They would tell the
    kid everything as he or she passed them (ie. head up, heels down,
    wrong diagonal, etc.)  Also, they would be strategically placed
    around the ring to make sure the kid didn't mess up.  This used
    to really aggrivate me, because I had to school my horse myself,
    try to take lessons once a week, get a ride to a show with someone
    else, and once at the show, I was on my own.  If no relatives came
    to watch, it was just me and my horse, and often times these other
    kids would place because they had people watching them at all times
    and correcting their position etc. (little did the judge know).
    But I always got my revenge in the jumping classes, because my horse
    loved to jump, and most of those kids had horses that refused or
    ran out and their 'coaches' couldn't help much with that.
    
    Because of that type of show atmosphere, I got so disgusted with
    it that I stopped going to shows for a couple of years.  The only
    kind of competition I'll enter now is eventing or dressage shows
    where you don't run into 'show families' like you find at regular
    shows.  It would be nice if there was a rule saying that any competitor
    found receiving help or assistance of any kind during a class will
    be eliminated from that class.  In eventing, if a rider falls or
    loses a crop or hat, the spectators are not allowed to assist them
    because the competitor will be eliminated.

    Thank you everyone for all your support.  I really didn't write
    this to "pick" on this particular woman (although she annoyed me),
    it's just that the situation haunted me all weekend.  
    
    Would it help if clubs (i.e. American, NEHC, etc) publicized the
    "family/instructor" etiquette as much as they do exhibitor etiquette?
    I'm in a position where it's possible for me to make a push for
    that to happen if it would help.
    
    Also....regarding .6
    >kids would place because they had people watching them at all times
    >and correcting their position etc. (little did the judge know).
    
    Don't kid yourself!  It's not that hard to pick out the kids that
    have been propped up on their wind-up ponies from the kids that
    are really *RIDING* their ponies.  It's just that a judge can't
    always tell which kid it is getting the instructions and you don't
    want to penalize the wrong kid.  You should see the horror on the
    face of some kids when their asked to do individual workouts, or
    if they did their own braids (I'm just nosey and like to know, doesn't
    really mean anything to me).  Suddenly a voice on the rail can't
    help!  
    
    Another thing that's come to my attention lately is the use of wireless
    walkie-talkie type things in the ring.  I've seen kids wearing them
    during a class (so that they can listen to an instructor on the
    the rail) and get used!  Are they pulling that stunt where you are?
    
    Ann

    I thought that there were strict AHSA rules concerning coachingfrom
    the sidelines! I would think that the use of walkie talkies in the
    show ring would be automatic grounds for disqualification!
    
    On the other hand, being hard of hearing I think walkie talkies
    would be a neat thing to use during riding lessons!
    
    As far as the coaching from sidelines... I thought that it was illegal.
    Whnever my daughter's trainer would coach during an equitation class
    it was at a far corner of the ring and out of earshot from any show
    official ( in other words, discreetly!)
    

    It seems like there are two issues here, one of show parents and
    one of sideline coaching.  The sideline coaching from my own experience
    is more of a distraction than a help.  You end up spending most
    of your ride getting in position to hear your coach and as a result
    don't pay attention to where you are in the class.  A remote mike
    is a novel idea but I haven't seen it used in New England yet.
       The bigger problem is the show parent who pushes their children
    (who usually want to please) to the brink and add to that an animal
    not suited to the rider and you have a potentially hazardous situation.
    In our litigation happy society, I shudder to think of the libilities
    to the show which ends up with this situation.  Its probably time
    for AHSA to provide some protection for these kids in spite of their
    parents.  One way would be to give judges the responsibility to
    excuse an unruly horse sooner than they currently do.  The key here
    is to pick out the bad horse/rider combinations rather than to give
    a competant rider who is just having a bad ride the gate.  Today
    such a decision by a judge would be very unpopular, but maybe if
    the governing body (AHSA) where pushing it, there would be less
    of a scene.
    
    

    My daughter began riding this last spring.  She has since fallen
    once from the horse she was riding and, fortunately, was able to
    recover quickly.  I guess that its every parents wish to see that
    their child is not hurt in any way but riding horses has its possible
    disasters as does any other sport.  I have taken riding lessons
    and have had my own spills and can appreciate what a youngster is
    going through when they fall for their first time.  I firmly believe
    that a parent should be required to get up on the horse and try
    it for themselves as a prerequisite to allowing their children to
    do so.
    
    I do also believe that some parents are motivated by social pressures
    rather than new, holesome experiences for their children.  They
    are, I believe, more concerned about their embarassement rather
    than safety of the child.  You know what I mean, "My child rides
    in Horse Shows, I bet your child can't do that!  Isn't she wonderfull?"
    The children aren't learning to ride but are learning to hate their
    parents.  I've said my piece.  I sure hope the kid was all right.
    
    Denny
    

    I received a call from the kid's mother yesterday (I had asked her
    to call and let me know how she made out).  It seems the paramedic
    was premature in his diagnosis (I thought he had accompanied the
    child to the hospital).  Stephanie ended up with a bruised hip and
    knee, a couple of messed up ligaments, but no broken bones.
    Emotionally she is fine (according to the mother).  Ah, relief.
    
    As for the AHSA ruling on coaching, I agree that there needs to
    be more specific rules established to address the issue.  My personal
    opinion is that coaching should not be allowed - period. (I do,
    however, appreciate that there are times that should be excused.
    i.e. situations that could become hazardous without the aide of
    a more experienced person).  I really went wild over the
    "walkie-talkie" concept...but currently there is no _specific_ ruling
    on it, therefore, I think a steward would tell you it must be allowed.
    
    Ann